When people find out I have three kids, they tell me: “Oh you must have your hands full.” Many mom bloggers rage against this because they feel that there’s contempt hidden behind these words. They feel it means that we have too many children, that we are crazy, out of control and have no idea what we’re doing. Which may be partially correct but not very helpful. Others offer tips what to say instead of “You have your hands full” and except for “enjoy every moment”, I agree with all of them.
Personally, I don’t mind being told I have my hands full because it is the truth.
I walk away and smile because these people have no idea how right they are.
Of course my hands are full. How can they not be, with three kids? They are full of little clothes to wash, dinners and snacks to prepare, toys to buy and clean up.
They are full of little warm bodies to hug and cuddle, of tiny hands to hold and of heads to caress.
In the moments that my hands are not busy with children’s affairs, they can usually be found holding a book, typing away at the computer. But mostly, they are writing about the kids anyway, just like they’re doing now. Sometimes, they’re doing nothing for a change, which is also nice.
But my hands are not the only thing that is full with my children.
No matter whether they are around or not, my head is full of thoughts of them. “Will K. like it?” and “How is J. doing at daycare?” and “M is so active, what a fun little boy!”
I think about them. I worry about them. I miss them. I am happy for them. Sometimes, I am even angry with them or feel sad about something they did. Yes, one way or another, my head is full as well.
And so is my mouth because many words that come out of my mouth are about my kids. I tell them I love them, I ask them about their day, I tell them to clean up after themselves. I talk to them. I read books to them. I sing for them. I kiss little cheeks and noses and make ouchies magically disappear with my kisses. I talk about them a lot, maybe even too much. Sometimes, the words that I say are “I am so tired”. Sometimes, they are not even meant for children, but they were definitely “inspired” by them.
My eyes are full of my children as well, when I watch them play or sing or make a mess. When they want to show me something. “Mama, look, look, looook!” Of course, I have to look to see what they’ve painted or built with DUPLO blocks. I have the kids before my eyes when I look at toys or clothes and try to find the prettiest ones.
Sometimes, this fullness is all too much. Sometimes, I need to step back, lie down, clear my thoughts and just be alone. Be empty, in a good way, even if just for a moment.
To let my hands, my head and my eyes rest.
But my heart will never rest because without the heart’s involvement, the actions of my hand, head and mouth wouldn’t mean anything. My heart will always be full of the love I feel for my kids, no matter how annoyed, tired or cranky I am.
Yes, I am so full.
My hands are full.
My head is full.
My eyes are full.
But my heart is the fullest of them all.
What are some of the ways in which your children make you feel fulfilled?
This is an original post to World Moms Blog by Olga Mecking of The Netherlands. Photo credit: le vent le cri. This picture has a creative commons attribution license.