SPECIAL REPORT: Our Family’s Plea after the #EcuadorEarthquake

SPECIAL REPORT: Our Family’s Plea after the #EcuadorEarthquake

In the aftermath of the recent earthquake in Ecuador, the people of my husband’s home country are on our minds and in our hearts, and we are very much in touch. Today, I am giving them a voice on World Moms Blog…

Beautiful Ecuador

Beautiful Ecuador. A photo from the hacienda belonging to my husband’s family in Cuenca.

Ecuador is the home of the Galapagos Islands, aromatic coffee, delicious chocolate, and my husband. He was born and raised in Cuenca, a charming colonial city in the mountains. Although we reside in the United States with our two children, my husband always makes it a point that we always stay connected to the place he still refers to as home. We got engaged on his hacienda (family’s land), honeymooned in the Galapagos Islands, and continue to vacation in Ecuador every year. My children love visiting with their abuela and primos and enjoy all the natural splendors that their father’s home country has to offer. Ecuador is always very much in our minds and in our hearts.

So, on April 16th when we heard the news that a 7.8 magnitude earthquake hit the country, we were a little rattled ourselves.

We learned that my husband’s family was safe, and although they were over 200 miles away from the epicenter they felt the tremors of the quake. They explained that the ground thunderously shook for over a minute, rattling chandeliers and unhinging doors. It was like nothing they had ever experienced before.

What remains or a gift shop in Manta, Ecuador after a series of recent earthquakes in April 2016. Manta is Ecuador's largest seaport on the Pacific ocean.

What remains of a gift shop in Manta, Ecuador after a series of recent earthquakes recently in April 2016. Manta is Ecuador’s largest seaport on the Pacific ocean.

The epicenter was located in the coastal region of Ecuador, which includes some port cities, picturesque coastal towns and small fishing communities. Buildings crumbled to the ground, over 600 people were killed and thousands were displaced from their homes. Most of the area impacted is very poor with limited infrastructure, most of which was destroyed. Initial efforts focused on emergency response and rescue. Organizations like the Ecuadorian Red Cross (Cruz Roja Ecuatoriana) along with other civil and governmental organizations were mobilized quickly.

Yellow tape marked "Peligro" warns people of danger after the roof and balcony collapse of a building in Manta, Ecuador after the earthquakes in April 2016.

Yellow tape marked “Peligro” warns people of danger after the roof and balcony collapse of a building in Manta, Ecuador after the earthquakes in April 2016.

Based on my experience, this is a small and proud country. People boast about everything Ecuadorian including their fruit, wildlife, history and rich traditions. During this difficult time, they have pulled together to help their fellow compatriotas.

My husband’s family helped stock a mobile hospital that headed to the area immediately after the quake to provide emergency health care. Others provided food, clothing and basic essentials. In the days following the earthquake it became clear that the needs of the people were growing and that the rebuilding process was going to be slow. Access to clean water has become critical. Imagine not having safe water to drink or cook?

Once again, local families and companies in the surrounding areas joined together to provide water treatment equipment to service a small portion of those affected. They are making steps forward, but it’s still a long road ahead. There are many organizations that are still offering assistance in the area, according to our family there. One of them is Oxfam, which is working with the Ecuador government to provide safe water and storage to the area. The organization is also focusing on sanitation measures to prevent water borne diseases, especially among children and senior citizens. My family in Ecuador has seen Oxfam’s work on the ground and asked us to donate. We, in turn, are helping to spread the word.

A tin collapsed and bent tin roof and tilted building supports lean atop brick rubble in the aftermath of the earthquakes in Manta, Ecuador in April 2016.

A collapsed and bent tin roof and damaged building supports lean atop brick rubble in the aftermath of the earthquakes in Manta, Ecuador last month, April 2016.

The phrase si se puede is a phrase that enthusiastic Ecuadorian sports fans chant to support their teams.  It means “yes, we can.”  This phrase has become the motto of the relief efforts.

From the hearts of my family and the people of Ecuador who are in dire need of clean water in the aftermath of the earthquake, please consider donating to Oxfam to help the people of Ecuador see that the country’s chants of “si se puede” will overcome this natural disaster.

Angela and her husband on honeymoon in the Galapagos Islands, Ecuador in

Angela and her husband on honeymoon in the Galapagos Islands, Ecuador after they first married in her husband’s home country 10 years ago.

This is an original guest post from a World Moms Blog reader, Angela Vega, who is mom in the USA of two sensitive and curious children who keep her very busy.  Before deciding to stay home with her children, Angela worked in the field of marketing and advertising. She earned an undergraduate degree from Villanova University and an MBA from Thunderbird School of Global Management, where she met her husband.

Photo credits of the earthquake damage and hacienda to Pedro Vega on the ground in Ecuador.

Photo credit to the author for the honeymoon photo.

 

World Moms Blog

World Moms Blog is an award winning website which writes from over 30 countries on the topics of motherhood, culture, human rights and social good. Over 70 international contributors share their stories from around the globe, bonded by the common thread of motherhood and wanting a better world for their children. World Moms Blog was listed by Forbes Woman as one of the "Best 100 Websites for Women 2012 & 2013" and also called a "must read" by the NY Times Motherlode in 2013. Our Senior Editor in India, Purnima Ramakrishnan, was awarded the BlogHer International Activist Award in 2013.

More Posts

ISRAEL: Part II of IV: Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer

ISRAEL: Part II of IV: Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer

Neta sat down with World Mom contributor, Susie Newday in Israel to talk about living her life with metastasis breast cancer.

Neta sat down with World Mom contributor, Susie Newday in Israel to talk about living her life with metastasis breast cancer.

This is part two of our contributor and cancer nurse, Susie Newday’s, moving and in depth interview on breast cancer with her close friend. Grab a cup of something warm, and come be a fly on the wall with us, as two friends discuss living with metastatic breast cancer. There is something for us all to learn. (Click to catch up and read Part I, first.)

Susie: You know what I remember? I remember before I worked in oncology, when you were diagnosed for the first time. You were waiting for your scan results to see whether there was any metastases and you said to me, “If I have metastasis, my life is over.” When you were diagnosed with the recurrence was that the same feeling you had?

Neta: Yes, that was my feeling. I said to myself, I’m screwed. With metastasis you don’t recover. You get another year or two.

S: Or maybe longer.

N: I have to say that I have a hard time believing that. I don’t really see that in the cards.

S: I wish you many more years.

N: I wish. And I thank you very much, and I hope I do. I’m not saying I want to die, I don’t. I’ll be happy to be surprised for the good but the feeling is that this is the end.

S: You walk around with the feeling everyday?

N: Now it’s less. Since I lived through the setback I had with the bleeding in my brain, and everyone told me that I’m a medical miracle, I now say to myself that maybe there are miracles out there.

I am more open to the possibility that maybe there will be a miracle here, something I refused to believe beforehand when my cancer recurred.

S: Tell me what happened with your setback and the hospitalization.

N: When I was rediagnosed, I was receiving Aredia to strengthen my bones and a biological treatment that was part of a clinical trial. I went back to work. About two or three months after that I began having severe weakness. My hemoglobin kept going down and they decided to hospitalize me. My oncologist told me that the cancer has reached my bone marrow. I was hospitalized in the regular medical ward for a week and a half until space opened up in the oncology ward and then they moved me. I received blood transfusions and chemotherapy.

A day or two after I was moved, I started having confusion, and then I couldn’t see. For about 5 days I had what seemed like a gray veil over my eyes. I don’t remember much but they told me I was really confused, and they had to appoint a legal guardian to make my medical decisions. To do that I needed an interview with the psychiatrist. He asked me a lot of questions which I don’t remember,

but I do remember that he asked me how old my children were and I couldn’t tell him. I knew their names but not their ages.

My husband brought the kids to visit me, but afterwards he told me that it was a difficult decision whether or not to bring them because I couldn’t see, and they didn’t want the kids to get scared. He had consulted with the psychologist who said to bring them because it’s better for them to see their mother even if she is confused and doesn’t see than not to see her.

It was 5 very difficult days. They ran all kinds of tests from eye tests to an MRI. I remember being very afraid before the MRI. I remember them saying it’s a very important test to see what’s going on. Inside the machine everything was rotating, and there was a horrible noise. I remember it being very traumatic, also the MRI test itself and also the fact that I knew it was a very important test, and I didn’t know what they were looking for. After the fact, I now know they were looking for metastases in the brain. They didn’t find any, it was only a brain bleed, and then they said the situation is better than they thought.

I don’t remember everything from those days. I remember people coming to visit. I recognized the people who came.

Later on, I found out that my husband already prepared the older girls a bit to expect the worse. They said psalms, and no one really thought I was going to recover because my medical state was not good. Then on the fifth day I woke up in the morning, my mother came into the room, and I was able to see her.

The doctors came, and they did tests. My eyesight came back, but slowly. Even now I can see perfectly from far but my vision from close is still impaired and interferes with reading. But at least I see the world, I see things. I don’t need help walking.

Since that incident I say to myself maybe there is some kind of miracle going on here, maybe there is some kind of divine intervention. In the hospital everyone was saying they had never seen someone recuperate like I did with their eyesight returning. Maybe it had something to do with my willpower. After my husband was diagnosed, I realized why it was that I pulled through, why I’m still here. I’m here to organize things and take care of my family. It is much harder when both parents are ill. I couldn’t “go” and leave my husband here alone to also fight his disease and raise the children because it is impossible to do. Apparently someone up above realized that I’m still needed here. That’s the answer I give myself. No one has said that to me, I just feel it. No one has answers but after my husband was diagnosed with cancer I just understood why I am still here.

S: When was your husband diagnosed?

N: January 2013. He was admitted with a bowel obstruction and then was diagnosed with Metastatic Colon Cancer. He was diagnosed about 2-3 months after my prolonged hospitalization, and I hadn’t really recuperated yet. I had slowly been getting better. I would be hospitalized for a week or so and then released and then hospitalized again for a week. It was a big shock having another person in the family sick. When he wasn’t feeling well and needed to go to the Emergency Room I still wasn’t feeling great and I couldn’t drive. His brother came and picked him up.

S: What was going through your head when your husband was diagnosed?

N: That someone up above is crazy. It’s not just that I’m sick, and now he’s sick. It’s the fact that both of us are in a situation where the doctors are not optimistic. It’s not a situation where you can say to yourself that I will definitely beat this. It could be 1, 2 or 3 years. No one has any idea how long you have for sure. I said to myself and to God, why him? * He is such a good person. For sure he hasn’t sinned. Maybe I sinned unwittingly but him? With my husband it seemed like a different level, it was like he doesn’t deserve this. He is such a good person.

S: And you deserve it?

N: No. But HE is really a good person. He’s a better person than me. He has a good heart, he doesn’t hurt people. * I just couldn’t reconcile how it was possible that he could be sick because he didn’t deserve it because he is such a good person. You start saying to yourself that God went crazy. Is there no justice in the world? Two young parents with 4 children are both now sick. Something went wrong. Either God is putting us through some great trial or I don’t know what. It’s not fair. I felt very strongly that it was just not fair that he was sick too, it was enough that I was sick.

*(I went to get some tissues at this point for her, which were easy to find because as she said there are lots of tissues in her house.)

S: I think that women and especially mothers don’t see ourselves the way other people see us. We are very generous towards other but we don’t cut ourselves any slack. I’m flabbergasted how you’re talking about how your husband doesn’t deserve this to happen to him and you do? (We both started laughing at that point)

N: He is the kind of person who if you ask directions on how to get somewhere, even if it’s out-of-the-way he will take you there. I would try to explain, I would not take anyone all the way there.

S: What good things do you see in yourself, what things do you do that are good and that are unique to you?

N: I have more sensitivity to people. My husband doesn’t see certain things that I’m more intuitive about, also in life and also in work. Part of my job was to be sensitive to kids. I have more sensitivity to my surroundings which my husband might sometimes miss because he just doesn’t see it. I can be a good friend. As far as the kids, I’m more involved, I am with them more. I never said I don’t do good things. My husband is just good.

S: Were you always as involved with your kids or is it more since you have been sick?

N: It was always very important for me to be a mother, to be with the kids. The thing that stressed me out the most when I got sick was the kids, what’s going to be with the kids. I still struggle with that. I was always with them. After my births I took extended maternity leave. I saw motherhood as a very important role. I always had that, it’s not something that started now.

(For the full series: click here to read Part Iclick here to read Part IIclick here to read Part III and click here to read Part IV.)

This is an original post to World Moms Blog by our Africa and Middle East Editor, Susie Newday, in Israel. 

Photo credit to the author. 

 

Susie Newday (Israel)

Susie Newday is a happily-married American-born Israeli mother of five. She is an oncology nurse, blogger and avid amateur photographer. Most importantly, Susie is a happily married mother of five amazing kids from age 8-24 and soon to be a mother in law. (Which also makes her a chef, maid, tutor, chauffeur, launderer...) Susie's blog, New Day, New Lesson, is her attempt to help others and herself view the lessons life hands all of us in a positive light. She will also be the first to admit that blogging is great free therapy as well. Susie's hope for the world? Increasing kindness, tolerance and love. You can also follow her Facebook page New Day, New Lesson where she posts her unique photos with quotes as well as gift ideas.

More Posts - Website

Follow Me:
TwitterFacebookPinterestGoogle PlusYouTube

NEW YORK, USA: Love and Marriage

This topic may be taboo in some cultures, but I’m part French, and nothing is more important to the French then l’amour (although food and wine are very close contenders)!

I recently read an article somewhere that said many moms polled were having sex (I should say moms who are married or in a committed relationship) about 4 times a year… and they were ok with that, as were their partners.  Once a quarter?  Really!?  I know we are all exhausted by the time we get to bed, but isn’t it important for your and your partner’s happiness?  Isn’t it important for the health and well-being of your relationship with your significant other to be intimate? (more…)

Maman Aya (USA)

Maman Aya is a full-time working mother of 2 beautiful children, a son who is 6 and a daughter who is two. She is raising her children in the high-pressure city of New York within a bilingual and multi-religious home. Aya was born in Canada to a French mother who then swiftly whisked her away to NYC, where she grew up and spent most of her life. She was raised following Jewish traditions and married an Irish Catholic American who doesn’t speak any other language (which did not go over too well with her mother), but who is learning French through his children. Aya enjoys her job but feels “mommy guilt” while at work. She is lucky to have the flexibility to work from home on Thursdays and recently decided to change her schedule to have “mommy Fridays”, but still feels torn about her time away from her babies. Maman Aya is not a writer by any stretch of the imagination, but has been drawn in by the mothers who write for World Moms Blog. She looks forward to joining the team and trying her hand at writing!

More Posts

AUSTRALIA: Tough on the Outside – Marshmallow on the Inside

AUSTRALIA: Tough on the Outside – Marshmallow on the Inside

It occurred to me today that there’s nothing quite as attractive as a ‘tough’ guy who responds to a young child’s enthusiasm. Today driving home from work I stopped at the traffic lights and watched as a mother steered her young daughter, who was probably three or four, in a pram / tricycle combination across the crossing.

The endearing smile and enthusiastic wave that this small bundle of energy bestowed on everyone sitting at the traffic lights was enough to lighten the heaviest heart. What was great was that in the two separate cars alongside me, both of the ‘tough guys’ in work shirts waved back with the same enthusiasm as this little girl. This put a smile on my face that stayed with me all the way home. (more…)

Fiona Biedermann (Australia)

Fiona at Inspiration to Dream is a married mother of three amazing and talented MM’s (mere males, as she lovingly calls them) aged 13, 16 and 22, and she became a nana in 2011! She believes she’s more daunted by becoming a nana than she was about becoming a mother! This Aussie mother figures she will also be a relatively young nana and she’s not sure that she’s really ready for it yet, but then she asks, are we ever really ready for it? Motherhood or Nanahood. (Not really sure that’s a word, but she says it works for her.) Fiona likes to think of herself as honest and forthright and is generally not afraid to speak her mind, which she says sometimes gets her into trouble, but hey, it makes life interesting. She’s hoping to share with you her trials of being a working mother to three adventurous boys, the wife of a Mr Fix-it who is definitely a man’s man and not one of the ‘sensitive new age guy’ generation, as well as, providing her thoughts and views on making her way in the world. Since discovering that she’s the first blogger joining the team from Australia, she also plans to provide a little insight into the ‘Aussie’ life, as well. Additionally, Fiona can be found on her personal blog at Inspiration to Dream.

More Posts

CANADA: Redefining What It Means To Be A Real Man

CANADA: Redefining What It Means To Be A Real Man

Do you want to know why I love my husband? Because he is the total opposite of EVERYTHING that I was told that an Arab man is. That, despite him being a member of the male sex, he doesn’t conform to ideas of masculinity. Because HE IS a man who keeps his word.

Now don’t get me wrong. He hates doing housework…he doesn’t cook…he believes deep down that his word is the final word; he apologizes before he knows what upsets me, and he rarely open doors for me.

BUT, he is also a man who does housework when I am ill, brings me surprises every month, laughs with me, sings with me and changes diapers. He praises me as a wife and mother and comes home everyday after work with a big smile. And his favorite past-time is sitting in our bed watching old movies.

My husband is not unique per se, but he has helped me through many storms. One of the biggest storms that I have faced is my past.

When we first married, my husband could not understand where I had been. How could he? He was East, and I was West. It was a little joke between us, but in essence it described us in every way. (more…)

Salma (Canada)

An Imperfect Stepford Wife is what Salma describes herself as because she simply cannot get it right. She loves decorating, travelling, parenting,learning, writing, reading and cooking, She also delights in all things mischievous, simply because it drives her hubby crazy. Salma has 2 daughters and a baby boy. The death of her first son in 2009 was very difficult, however, after the birth of her Rainbow baby in 2010 (one day after her birthday) she has made a commitment to laugh more and channel the innocence of youth through her children. She has blogged about her loss, her pregnancy with Rainbow, and Islamic life. After relocating to Alberta with her husband in 2011 she has found new challenges and rewards- like buying their first house, and finding a rewarding career. Her roots are tied to Jamaica, while her hubby is from Yemen. Their routes, however, have led them to Egypt and Canada, which is most interesting because their lives are filled with cultural and language barriers. Even though she earned a degree in Criminology, Salma's true passion is Social Work. She truly appreciates the beauty of the human race. She writes critical essays on topics such as feminism and the law, cultural relativity and the role of women in Islam and "the veil". Salma works full-time, however, she believes that unless the imagination of a child is nourished, it will go to waste. She follows the philosophy of un-schooling and always finds time to teach and explore with her children. From this stance, she pushes her children to be passionate about every aspect of life, and to strive to be life-long learners and teachers. You can read about her at Chasing Rainbow.

More Posts - Website