I had a wonderful Mother’s Day, being loved and cared for by my husband and sons. The day prior, I had been out to brunch and observed several multigenerational families getting a jumpstart on the holiday over pancakes. It reminded me of the nagging longing that I have felt for the past 14 years of living in the Pacific Northwest.
I love where I live, but I am a plane ride away from any blood relative. As someone who grew up in a big family and lived walking distance to my grandmother’s house, it is not something I have fully made peace with.
Part of me wished that I could be sitting around a table with my mother and grandmother at that moment. I decided to do what I always do when I need to mentally regroup. I went walking in the woods.
My two-year-old and I headed to a familiar spot. My goal was to get in a decent walk with my son in the pack on my back. I made my way along a trail that leads to a big tree. You may think, “Really? A big tree will help?” Well, yes! This particular area had been a logging site for years, so most of the trees are quite young. But there is this one Douglar Fir that, for some reason, was left untouched.
Estimated to be 400 years old, it’s huge and makes the surrounding trees look like toothpicks. As I came across this giant, I stopped to take it all in: the immense base, the gnarly bark, and the towering height. I marveled at how this tree was here long before me, and how this tree will probably be here long after me. I thought about how, while I have my personal cares, crises and catharses, this tree is here in all it’s grandeur, unaffected by the woes of my world. It’s cares are more basic – having the essentials to sustain it. Do I have the essentials to sustain me? Yes. Absolutely! I felt better already.
As I continued on, I felt the weight on my pack shift. My son had fallen asleep, which was a good reason to keep going and burn some extra calories. I knew stopping would wake him. I approached a trail that I had attempted a few months prior. My intended destination was a group of small caves, but I never found them. My newly acquired nature boost prompted me to try again.
I took a different approach to the caves to see if they would be easier to find. On the way, I came across a party of female hikers: a grandmother, a mother, and a granddaughter. They were slowy making their way up the incline and identifying flowers along the way. We chatted briefly before I passed them. This time, my multigenerational encounter didn’t feel bittersweet.
Maybe it was because, out of the three, it was clear (by her cut calf muslces, her leading pace, and her good advice on the location of the caves) that the grandmother was the most fit and knowledgeable in her party. I was inspired to think that someday I could be the one with white hair hiking with my grandkids to the caves. That’s part of the reason that I love living where I do.
Not too long after, I found the caves. I must have blown right by them on my earlier hike when coming from the other angle. How do you miss caves in the middle of a trail? I made a mental note that if you are so focused on pushing to the destination, you don’t always see what is right in front of you.
Another passing family gave me the hiker scuttlebutt on a mama bear and her cub spotted near the caves an hour early. That was a multigenerational family I was not interested in meeting, so I made ample noise by singing to my groggy toddler on the way down.
John Muir wrote: “In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks.” I went to the woods to connect to the Earth, to feel what I needed to feel, and to refocus on the beauty of my life. When I have questions, I know the answers lie within me. More often than not, the woods help me find them.
Where do you go to regroup and find peace?
This has been an original post to World Moms Blog by Tara B. of Washington (State) USA.
Photo credit to the author.
Bush, beach or river for me, Tara. When I am able to (depending on sunlight hours matching my life) I love to get up before everyone else and sit and watch the sun begin to rise. Such a great way to start the day. Lovely post, the intergenerational connections are important, I agree.
I love the idea of getting up first. I rarely do because my children are early risers, but those quiet first moments are really special. I hope you coming winter isn’t too bad!
Thanks Tara.
Ok – this will probably make me sound crazy, but I go “inwards” to regroup and find peace!
Over the years I have deliberately “taken pictures with my mind”. How do you do that? Very simple, whenever you see a particularly beautiful view, sunset, whatever, just pause and tell yourself that you want to keep this picture. Focus on what you like – the colours etc, just like if you were looking through the viewfinder of a camera. “Mind pictures” never get lost or fade and they’re instantly available whenever you need to “regroup”! All you need to do is bring the picture to mind again and remember the wonder and bliss you felt in that moment. Aaaahh – I feel better already! 🙂
I love your technique! I have done something sort of iike that too, focusing on the feeling of a moment. One such day was out on a hike (surprise!). We made it to a lake, and I took off my boots to let me sore feet do a little sunbathing while we ate lunch on a giant boulder. Something about the sensations of that moment were really special and soothing, and I think back on it often. Thanks for your comments.
We are traveling down the same path, my friend! After growing up spending every Sunday visiting relatives – after going to church, breakfast at my dad’s parents, then a visit to his aunt & uncle, then dinner at my mom’s parents – it feels odd to be living across the country in what feels like solitude. But we live here because of the quality of life. We have a major city, the beach & ocean, and grand mountains at our finger tips.
My husband recently realized that his release is nature, mountain biking at Mount Tam to be specific. He always comes back feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. And then he found an recent article in the Wall Street Journal that explained the mental benefits of spending time in natural settings (I shared it via fb).
We felt the benefits of nature immediately when we moved from our flat in the heart of the city to our current home in the Presidio state park. We are surrounded by trees and birds and trails. When I need to regroup, I find myself walking out the door and walking or running one of these great trees. I can stop in a forest and forget that my house and children and just a stones through away. Or I coup myself up in my “yoga room” and find peace on my mat.
Having visited the San Fran area, I love that I can sort of visualize all the places you are talking about 😉 I really must come for a visit so we can wander together.
And I remember the article you posted on nature. Karyn also just shared this post via FB yesterday: http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health-and-fitness/fitness/why-is-walking-in-the-woods-so-good-for-you/article4209703/
I definitely go to the beach. Something about the sound of the crashing waves, the wind blowing through my hair and being able to feel the sand beneath my toes. It makes me feel very grounded and at peace. I am really at home any place in nature, but the beach is where I grew up. 🙂
Thank you for sharing your story, Tara!
Jen 🙂
The beach is special. And I can imagine so many nostalgic feelings if you grew up there – the sounds, the smells, and the ever shifting light on the water. Thanks for your comments!
I grew up in the Pacific Northwest, but in the desert of Eastern Washington. That still feels like home. But when I want renewal, I want the wind and the waves and the sound of the beach. I need water and space.
I have visited Eastern Washington and have enjoyed exploring the desert areas as well. I even had my first rock climbing experience out that way! Beautiful landscapes. Thanks for chiming in.
This one hit close to my heart. My family is an ocean away and I lived close to my grandma as well. We used to see her several times a week. Just for a quick coffee and chat. We have this tree in the neighbor hood. I just call it the tree and we walk there daily with the dogs. It always makes me feel better. I miss hiking in the woods. Something I’d like to do again…
Thank you for your comments. I love that you have a special tree too! It makes me wonder who else seeks out these special trees for comfort. There is a cool symmetry there.
I absolutely love and relate to this post! You described your walk and state of mind beautifully. As a fellow Pacific Northwest-er, I also find solace in the woods.
Right on! This is a really amazing place, and I am glad you find the joy in it too. And thank you so much for your kind remarks about how I wrote this post. You made my day 😉
Walking in the (NW) woods is the thing I miss most when living in the tropics. The smells, the sounds, and the peace of striding along a forested trail. In Timor, we had the beach, but in Jakarta, well…I haven’t found my special place yet. Thank you for taking me along on with you — I enjoyed the walk!
Thanks for your comments, Shaula! I hope you find your special place, as well as many other fun spots along the way 🙂
Thanks for your comments, Shaula! And I hope you find that special place, as well as discover many other fun things along the way.