I have to do this.
I have to do that.
I have to be there.
I have to be here.
How many times a day do you say, “I have to”?
I don’t know about anyone else but I know that I find myself saying the words “have to” way more times than I even notice.
Luckily I have my little six year old to call me out. If the “H” word happens to cross my mouth, she stops what she is doing, looks at me with an incredulous face and in one of her best imitations of me she emphatically says: “Eeeema (Hebrew for Mommmmy), you don’t HAVE to. You WANT to.” You got me kid. I don’t have to. I choose to.
Sometimes it might seem like you have no choice, but there is always a choice. It might be a choice between two lousy possibilities, but you still choose. Even not deciding is a choice.
It’s a choice to be insulted.
It’s a choice to forgive.
It’s a choice to take care of everyone else’s needs.
It’s a choice to put yourself first.
It’s a choice to keep your feelings to yourself.
It’s a choice to let someone into your confidence.
It’s a choice to hold someone or something tight.
It’s a choice to let someone or something go.
It’s a choice to be unappreciative.
It’s a choice to be grateful.
It’s a choice to resist.
It’s a choice to lean into acceptance.
It’s a choice to feel victimized by circumstances.
It’s a choice to take adversity by the horns and lift yourself up.
Too often we believe that we live in a world of “have to”. A world of not having a choice. I believe that life is a choice. If nothing else, it’s your choice about how you react to the world and the events around you.
Do you find yourself saying “I have to…”? What are the some of the hardest choices you have made?
This has been an original post to World Moms Blog by Susie Newday of Israel. You can find her positive thoughts on her blog, New Day New Lesson.
Photo credit to the author.
Susie Newday (Israel)
Susie Newday is a happily-married American-born Israeli mother of five. She is an oncology nurse, blogger and avid amateur photographer. Most importantly, Susie is a happily married mother of five amazing kids from age 8-24 and soon to be a mother in law. (Which also makes her a chef, maid, tutor, chauffeur, launderer...) Susie's blog, New Day, New Lesson, is her attempt to help others and herself view the lessons life hands all of us in a positive light. She will also be the first to admit that blogging is great free therapy as well. Susie's hope for the world? Increasing kindness, tolerance and love. You can also follow her Facebook page New Day, New Lesson where she posts her unique photos with quotes as well as gift ideas.
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Amen to that, Susie. I choose to sit here and read this post instead of doing the dinner dishes. 😀 Great that you have a small person around to keep you conscious!
Kary, it should be somebody else’s choice to do the dishes… maybe 😉
WoW!!
I choose to ‘let go!’
I love the poem! This is a great reminder! Thank you!
Excellent post Susie!
Sometimes it’s hard to admit that we actually CHOOSE to do some of the things we claim we “have to” do! However, once we get honest about it, it’s quite a liberating feeling! 🙂
I agree whole heartedly that we choose how we interpret and channel our feelings regarding the events around us. It makes a huge difference in my day of managing little ones. You wrote your thoughts in such a lovely way, too. Nice post!
you post reminds me of my husband’s words. he always say that it is my choice to be mad or depressed and it is my choice to hold on to those feelings or just let go and choose to be happy!
Loved this Susie – and I love that your 6 yo keeps you in line 🙂
I need to get better about this one….”It’s a choice to take care of everyone else’s needs. It’s a choice to put yourself first.” I don’t put myself first often enough – and clearly no one else is stepping up to do it for me!
Thanks for the reminder 🙂
Hi Susie!
Your post speaks to me, too! Tough decisions for me are having to say no to anything!!
Jen 🙂
Great post and great reminder! My life changed completely when I started choosing and stopped doing things out of imagined obligation. Thank you, Susie!
Great post Susie, and a wonderful way of looking at things! Thank you to your daughter for the gentle reminder!