Indonesia: Explaining Trump to my American Child

Indonesia: Explaining Trump to my American Child

You are an immigrant Mommy…is that mean you can’t come to America?

There’s a concern in his tone. A frown showed up as he tries to make sense of his new elected president.

Well…technically I am no longer an immigrant, Alex. I once was when we were still living there until you were 2 years old.

He searched my face for more answer.

But right now, for the time being, we will not be living in America. We are living here in Indonesia. Of course, one day if we want to, we may come there for a visit to see your Grandparents, your Uncle Greg, and his family also your brothers.

But Trump won’t let you come because you are not American!

I’m sure it will all be alright when the time comes. Let’s not worry until then ok? With the right paper works, of course, I can still come with you. I will need a visa first.

What’s a visa, Mommy? How come you don’t have one?

A visa is like a permit to visit a country. Every country has different rules when it comes to visa. I don’t have one after my conditional resident permit ended.

Then I went on to explain what a green card is, how I got one in the first place many years ago while I was still married to his father. Of how I returned the card post-divorce.

My almost 10 year old boy was worried that his mother, a non-US citizen may not be able to go to America with him one day. He overheard the news while I watched the whole campaign and how Trump has been voted in as president of the United States.

Why is he so angry all the time?” was his first question when he asked who Trump is.

Being a mother to a dual citizenship child, I have been following the whole election period. Why? Because my son is an American citizen. Whoever won the election will have a lasting impact on his future in one way or another.

Yes, we are living thousands of miles away from America but trust me, being a third world country citizen what happens in America will greatly impact everyone. I still vividly remember how scary it was post the September 11 tragedy. I was working in a hotel in Jakarta and an emergency plan was set in place because a hardline Muslim group was sweeping hotels looking for American citizens after the attack.

Being of the minority religion in Indonesia  (I am a Christian) any time there’s a religious uproar going on in my country, we are living in danger to say the least. So Trump’s anti-Muslim propaganda will greatly impact everyone. With Indonesia being the most Muslim populated country, declaring war on my Muslim friends will cause scary consequences.

Not all Muslim are terrorists so it is truly unfair how Trump is making his blanket statements. I have Muslim friends living in America who have received discriminations ever since he ran his campaign and I fear for their safety too.

There’s little that I could do other than telling my son that hatred will not help anyone, that what the world desperately needs at the moment is more love, more compassion towards one another regardless of race, the color of peoples’ skin, religious beliefs and sexual orientations. I can only pray that my son will grow up with great respect and kindness to the many differences we all have as human beings.

How do you explain the American election result to your children?


Founder of Single Moms Indonesia, community leader and builder. Deeply passionate about women empowerment.

More Posts

Follow Me:
TwitterFacebookGoogle Plus

WORLD VOICE: Egyptian Lawmaker Proposes Virginity Tests Before College Admission

WORLD VOICE: Egyptian Lawmaker Proposes Virginity Tests Before College Admission

Photo Credit: Sky2105 Sara Yap

Photo Credit: Sky2105 Sara Yap

Education and access to having one has always been a goal families strive for, but in Egypt, that access to education for women may be in jeopardy. Young adults who aim to continue their education in college are usually filled with excitement, but a new proposed law may change the future of many, especially young women.

In a recent article, a new law is being proposed in Egypt, which would mandate every young woman to be subjected to a virginity test before being allowed to attend a university. An MP lawmaker, Elhamy Agina, has tried to have this passed as a law to curtail “Urfi marriages”. Also known as “customary marriages”, they are perceived as secret marriages since they are performed by a cleric and only require two witnesses. In addition, these unions are not officially registered and are contrary to their culture of having both parents’ blessings.

Agina believes that prior to being admitted to any university, young Egyptian women should be subjected to a virginity test to ensure that they are indeed a “Miss”, which would indicate that they are still virgins. Once the test has concluded that the young woman is still a virgin, then and only then would she be given a document stating that she has passed and can be admitted to that specific university.

According to Egyptian culture, premarital sex is forbidden and while there are young couples who go through Urfi marriages, it’s a way of eliminating wedding costs and unwanted pressure from their families. For conservative clerics and officials like Agina, Urfi marriages are seen as a way to skirt around pre-marital sex.

I am not familiar with Egyptian culture, but I don’t think I’m far off in perceiving this proposed law as a violation of women’s rights. Why should anyone, let alone a government official have the right to control a woman’s body? What does a woman’s virginity have anything to do with one’s right to an education? How is withholding a woman’s education because she may not be a virgin not considered as a human rights violation?

As someone whose family and culture have  always placed education as a high priority, I find it scary and ludicrous how the views of one man can alter a woman’s scholastic future. Even worse, the views he espouses can hurt not only female students but every woman he feels should be controlled.

Since the publication of the article, Agina has come under fire and has changed his tune somewhat, citing that the virginity tests were a “suggestion”, not a “demand”. Changing the term from a “demand” to a “suggestion” does not diminish the intent of subjugating women to further one lawmaker’s desire for control.

Will this proposed law gain enough support to be passed? I don’t know the answer, but I sincerely hope not. As a mother of a young woman who, herself, is almost a college student, it is my hope that Egyptian women stand up against a law that will not only control their future, but those of generations to come.

To read the original article, click below:

This is an original post written for World Moms Network by Tes Silverman.


Tes Silverman

Tes Silverman was born in Manila, Philippines and has been a New Yorker for over 30 years. Moving from the Philippines to New York opened the doors to the possibility of a life of writing and travel. Before starting a family, she traveled to Iceland, Portugal, Belgium, and France, all the while writing about the people she met through her adventures. After starting a family, she became a freelance writer for publications such as Newsday’s Parents & Children and various local newspapers. Fifteen years ago, she created her blog, The Pinay Perspective. is designed to provide women of all ages and nationalities the space to discuss the similarities and differences on how we view life and the world around us. As a result of her blog, she has written for and has been invited to attend and blog about the Social Good Summit and Mom+Social Good. In addition, she is a World Voice Editor for World Moms Network and was Managing Editor for a local grass roots activism group, ATLI(Action Together Long Island). Currently residing in Virginia Beach, VA with her husband, fourteen year-old Morkie and a three year old Lab Mix, she continues to write stories of women and children who make an impact in their communities and provide them a place to vocalize their passions.

More Posts - Website

Follow Me: