by Karyn Wills | Jun 3, 2013 | Babies, Being Thankful, Health, Kids, Life Balance, Maternal Health, Motherhood, New Zealand, Nutrition, Parent Care, Pregnancy, World Motherhood, Younger Children
I had my third baby when I was 41. Many people told me I was bonkers and a few refused to congratulate me, but those who knew how it felt to long for a baby, whether that baby was number one or number six, were as delighted as I was.
I was unfit, I knew that once the baby came I would feel tired, and I knew that I would have no time to myself. We already had one son who felt secure with strong boundaries and a gazillion hugs a day, and another who felt truly secure only while he was attached to my body. I knew that I would have to take each day, each hour, perhaps each minute as it came.
This was my self-imposed Everest: to give completely of myself until all the boys chose to pull away from me or manage my small nudges out of the nest, in order that they properly develop their wings. I figured things would begin to get somewhat easier at around the 18 month to two year mark. A friend, who had also had a third baby in her 40s, said it would take four years. I didn’t believe her.
I hadn’t counted on a 24 hour labour followed by a massive bleed on the operating table during an emergency C-Section. I hadn’t planned on premenopausal bodily hiccups. I never imagined I’d feel like I was churning through porridge day after day, after day, after day. But that’s what I got.
Just before Christmas last year I could stand it no longer. I was barely functioning, and I truly felt like this level of energy was my lot. I had three energetic and wonderful boys who needed a Mum with some oomph and pizzazz. I did a breathing rate test off the internet, and my results were worse than a heavy smoker and the same as someone in heart-failure. I went to the doctor.
It was then that I discovered that my iron and haemoglobin levels were extremely low – I joke that I was three quarters dead. Thankfully, my vitamin B levels were fine, my thyroid was doing its happy dance, and I passed the depression test. I got my iron levels sorted and began to feel a bit better.
Still, I wasn’t feeling great and I did wonder, again, if this amount of energy was my lot.
I tweaked my diet. I began rising earlier and going to bed at the same time as the boys. Our baby turned three and a half, and then three and three quarters.
And now, finally, after close to four years, I am almost back to myself. I cannot possibly regret having a gorgeous and much loved child in my 40s. I cannot possibly regret any of the time or energy I have put into any of my beautiful boys. But I can tell you this in complete confidence:
I am damned pleased to be on this side of the mountain!
How did life events affect how you coped with parenting your babies and toddlers?
This is an original post to World Moms Blog from our contributor in New Zealand, Karyn.
The image used in this post is credited to Lindsey Turner. It holds a Flickr Creative Commons attribution license.
Karyn is a teacher, writer and solo mother to three sons. She lives in the sunny wine region of Hawke’s Bay, New Zealand in the city of Napier.
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by Maureen | May 23, 2013 | Health, Hobby, Life Balance, Parent Care, Scoops of Joy, Working Mother, World Moms Blog
We are all busy moms. Some of us work full time, some of us stay at home, and some of us work from home. Bottom line, we are all busy busy busy.
Sometimes we wish we have more than 24 hours in a day to get things done, right?
But you know what, if we do have let’s say 28 hours a day, chances are we’ll be working even longer, be even busier.
Since I’m taking healthy living more seriously and now that it has become my lifestyle of choice, I’d like to share with you these tips:
- Ditch the guilt! Why are we as moms are so hardwired to feel guilty when we do take some times alone for ourselves? We need to STOP this. Nothing is wrong about taking an hour out of your hectic schedule to workout, make it your ME time. When Mom is happy, everyone is happy right? Exercise produces endorphins, and endorphins equals happy Moms. (more…)
by travelladywithbaby | Oct 25, 2012 | Body Image, Breastfeeding, Health, Life Lesson, Maternal Health, Motherhood, Parent Care, World Motherhood
Before I got pregnant, I had one fear, and it was never about childbirth: I was terrified of breastfeeding. I am not sure where it came from, or what specifically made me go into panic mode about it, but it almost looked unnatural to me. Having spent so much time in Asia, breastfeeding was just not seen or done much in public. I also don’t have many younger cousins, so naturally, I wasn’t exposed to it.
When I got pregnant, I spent months plagued with anxiety, researching and keeping my breastfeeding fears to myself. I finally blurted it all out during a big, pregnant “I-am-not-fit-to-be-a-Mother” meltdown in front of my husband. He tried not to laugh, and asked “Is this your only concern?” I had to pause, and think. Well, yes, I was set about everything else. But for some reason, breastfeeding just freaked me out! (more…)
Travel Lady with Baby has never had two feet in one city for long, growing up as a diplomatic kid, bouncing around from one country to another became the norm. Born in Canada, but never feeling Canadian, rather a Hodge Podge of cultures and traditions, Mandarin was her first language, not English, and Spanish still comes out of her mouth when trying to speak French.
Travel Lady with Baby declared to her Father that a career in the U.N was her future, but settled for a career at Foreign Affairs on an intense U.N file. After several years of non-stop travel, and having never put up a picture on the wall, she and her husband threw caution to the wind and moved to Vancouver, B.C. to work on an Olympic file.
Vancouver brought, a dog, a baby boy and a life-altering event that changed everything. It was this event that made Travel Lady with Baby and her husband realize that Vancouver had run its course, so, naturally it was time to embark on another adventure.
Packing everything into a small storage space and giving up their condo, they got on a plane for two months to travel with their son. For the first time, they breathed, got perspective, became present as parents and realized what they wanted. Landing back in Vancouver solidified a business plan and a move to a small town in Quebec.
Now running a Sustainable Consulting and Promotions Company with her husband, re-learning French (yes, you do lose it if you don't use it), waking up to a toddler that has more energy than a soccer team, juggling clients, a household, research and marketing, and squeezing in blogging about travel has been nothing but exhilarating.
It is very likely that there is another move and way more travel in the near future, but at least this time, they finally put pictures up on the walls. Check out her personal blog, Travel Lady with Baby.
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by Margie Webb (USA) | Sep 26, 2012 | Family, Grandparent, Health, Life Lesson, Motherhood, Parent Care, Uncategorized, World Motherhood
Earlier this week, I experienced the moment that finally made me feel like an adult. I mean, sure, I am 39 years old and a mother to two boys. Also, I am engaged, work full-time and attend school full-time. I own a home and a car and manage to keep my finances in order.
Yet, until earlier this week, I believe there was still a part of me that was clinging to a shred of the innocence of youth.
My mom has two daughters, of which I am the youngest. My sister is seven years older than me and has always been the one to handle emergency situations. As the baby of the family, I have never had much responsibility placed on my shoulders. And that suited me just fine. Little has been expected of me during any family crises.
My Mom is one of the toughest women that I know and it takes a great deal to slow her down. At 69 years old, her yard and house is much cleaner that mine; she works in both almost daily. I joke that she has an old school work ethic that I just will never possess. (more…)
Margie Webb is a forty-something, divorced mom of three biracial sons: Isaiah (25), Caleb (20), and Elijah (6/8/1997 - 7/2/1997) and two bonus sons: Malcolm (5/10/1992 - 10/9/2015) and Marcus (25). She lives in Lafayette,
Louisiana by way of Little Rock, Arkansas, and enjoys traveling, attending the theater, cooking calling the Hogs during Arkansas Razorback football season, spending time with family and friends, and is a crazy cat lady.
In addition to obtaining her Bachelors and Masters degree, she also has a Graduate Certificate in Online Writing Instruction and a National HR Certification through SHRM. She excels in her career as a Human Resources Management professional. Additionally, she has represented World Moms Network as a Digital Reporter at various conferences, including the United Nations Social Good Summit.
Her life has been one big adventure in twists, turns ,extreme lows, and highs. After recently embracing her new lease on life and her identity in the LGBTQ community, she is excited about what is yet to come. She can be found on Twitter@TheHunnyB
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by Ruth | Apr 20, 2012 | Culture, Eye on Culture, Family, Motherhood, Parent Care, Parenting, Ruth Wong, Singapore, World Motherhood
Have you ever thought about why you’re having kids?
Some have kids because they think it’s part of the “marriage progression”, they want to carry on their bloodline or because everyone around them are having children.
Others feel that they want to leave a legacy through their offspring. Then there are those who do it simply because they have a strong desire to have children.
In Asia, it’s not uncommon for people to want to have children to ensure that there’s someone to look after them when they turn old. In fact, there’s even a Chinese idiom 养儿防老 – which translates to mean “raise children to safeguard your old age”.
Indeed, in Asian societies that have been strongly influenced by Confucius teachings, such as China, Japan, Korea and Singapore, the practice of filial piety is still seen as an important social value and esteemed as virtue to be inculcated in one’s children from a very young age.
Children are not only expected to respect and obey their parents, it’s also deemed their duty to look after their parents in old age. (more…)
Ruth lives in Singapore, a tiny island 137 kilometres north of the equator. After graduating from university, she worked as a medical social worker for a few years before making a switch to HR and worked in various industries such as retail, banking and manufacturing. In spite of the invaluable skills and experiences she had gained during those years, she never felt truly happy or satisfied. It was only when she embarked on a journey to rediscover her strengths and passion that this part of her life was transformed. Today, Ruth is living her dreams as a writer. Ironically, she loves what she does so much that at one point, she even thought that becoming a mom would hinder her career. Thanks to her husband’s gentle persuasions, she now realises what joy she would have missed out had she not changed her mind. She is now a happy WAHM. Ruth launched MomME Circle, a resource site to support and inspire moms to create a life and business they love. She has a personal blog Mommy Café where she writes about her son's growing up and shares her interests such as food and photography.
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by Amy Hillis (USA) | Mar 7, 2012 | Death and Dying, Health, Loss of Child, Motherhood, Parent Care, Parenting, World Motherhood
Being a mom is hard work.
Being a mom after one of your children has died is indescribable.
I thought the days that directly followed the passing of my eight month old son were difficult. But soon those days drifted into weeks. Those weeks quickly drifted into months. Here I am, over a year later, and it still feels like David’s passing was just yesterday.
I began to wonder if something was wrong with me. There are days I don’t want to get out of bed. There are days that I yell at my kids over silly things they have done. There are days when I feel alone, even when the house is full of people.
Well-meaning people around me thought I should be over it. That I should be beyond the grief that holds me hostage.
In part, I agreed.
Not that I would ever be over it, no one can ever “get over” the death of a child. But the grief that holds me (more…)
Amy is a native Chicagoan that currently resides just outside of Cincinnati, OH. A city girl, through and through, she’s still adjusting to small town life. Amy has a Bachelor’s degree in Fine Art with a minor in French from Elmhurst College. She was working on her Master’s degree at the School of the Art Institute in Chicago, when she became pregnant with her 3rd child. Although this angel boy was only here for a very short time – he left quite a legacy.
Nathaniel was born with a rare genetic disorder called Citrullinemia. Amy and her husband, James, went on to have 4 more boys, 3 of whom were also born with Citrullinemia. In January 2011, her youngest son, David passed away from complications of a liver transplant performed to 'cure' the Citrullinemia. Now a stay-home mom of 5, she started blogging in October 2010, while David was still in the hospital. Two of her other sons have had successful liver transplants to cure their genetic disorders.
Her 2 older children still live in Chicago. When not hanging out with her kids, she spends her ‘me’ time writing, sewing, reading & walking. Amy also spends a generous amount of time online. She can be found on Twitter @transplantedx3. On Facebook and on her Website <a href="http://mytearstainedlife.com"My Tear-Stained Life
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