Yippyy! It’s a brand new year and a brand new writing gig for me. What better way to introduce myself to y’all then to cozy up with you and let you know, nay ANNOUNCE to you, just what kind of a Mom I really am.
Lean in close, friends. Are you comfy? Perhaps with a cocktail in hand? Excellent. Here it is:
Sometimes? I kind of suck at the Mom thing.
Don’t get me wrong. Being a Mom is the most amazingly wonderfully fulfilling role that I have ever had. Bar none. My cup is over-flowing every single nano-second of every single day because I know that yes. Yes, I am indeed, THAT lucky to be THEIR mom.
Little hand holds. Big squeezes. Small smiles. And HUGE milestones. These are the things that make my whole world spin. Aroundandaroundandaround again.
And I know (Believe me. I know.) that it’s good for our children to see us as fallible beings. That it’s good to model how we recover from moments that could be described as less than quality parenting. And that it’s good (Very, very good.) to humble our ego-driven selves every once in a while, take stock of what’s IMPORTANT and apologize to the sweet beings that are in our care.
But every once in a while when I make mistakes, and I have moments (Hours! Days!) that are such total and complete FAILS that I wish (Beg!) the universe to erase them. Or at the very least that no one else sees or hears about them. And at the very most, that my children have zero, zip, nada recollection. Of any of it.
But there’s a danger in never sharing those less than stellar moments. And here it is: It can feel lonely FAILING because I just never know. I never know if you ever lose your cool? Turn on the TV? For gasp more than one show? Serve peanut butter and jelly for dinner? Several nights in a row? Run out of milk? Or diapers? Or forget to send library books back to school?
Does your heart ever ache with utter disappointment in yourself?
Because mine does. I’ve done all of that up there. I make mistakes. And I’m not above admitting that parenting is HARD. I’m also not afraid to beg for mercy and call a do-over on some of those rotten, good for nothing days.
So right here, right now- you and me- let’s wave the white flag and admit to each other that some parenting moments are not necessarily blog worthy. But we can carve out this little teeny tiny space on the web and admit- just between the two of us- that MOM FAIL moments exist. That way we won’t ever feel so alone, so disparate, so on our own doing the Mom thing. Because what good could ever (Seriously ever?) come of that?
To start us off, here are three of my MOM FAIL Moments:
MOM FAIL #3: My third, Brody, turned two in September and is waaaay into potty training. The boy knows when he needs to pee, tells me when he poops and is all about sitting while he goes and flushing afterwards. But me? No way. Nope. Not ready. I’m getting the heeby-jeebys just thinking of potty training. A boy. In Winter. In Minnesota. Do you know how many layers we wear, people?! So when he asks to go potty? I say, “No. You go in your diaper.”
MOM FAIL #2: I let my kids wear their pajamas while we go sledding. And then afterwards, we stay in our jammys all day long. Why? Because we’re a family of five and I need more laundry like I need a hole in the head.
And as for my #1 MOM FAIL? My favorite time of the day is nap-time. My second favorite time of the day is bedtime.
So what do you think? Do you still want to be my friend? And if you do, do you by any chance have a MOM FAIL moment to share?
No?
Not even one?
Liar.
Fess up, Mama. Together let’s make that big, bad scary FAIL into a friendlier, shoulder-to-shoulder HOORAY that we made it through the day lowercase fail. Kind of like that.
Ready now?
Excellent.
My feet are up. My cocktail is in hand. And my ears are perked. Because the real HOORAY here is that not only is it nap-time, but we’re connecting Mom-to-Mom. Friend-to-friend. And that’s the good stuff that we Mamas do with and for each other.
Go for it. I’m listening.
This has been an original post to World Moms Blog by Galit Breen of Minnesota, USA. Check out Galit’s profile on our Writer’s Page!
Photo credit to Galit Breen.
Great post!! I’m thinking, I’m thinking…less than stellar parenting moment…I have them all the time…I will return today when I think of a good one!
Veronica Samuels:)
OK! I’m ready!
1) Stored breast milk once in the minbar of a hotel room not realizing that it wasn’t cold enough in there, and when I fed it to my daughter when she was 4 mos. old,…she got sick. 🙁
2) The old, “Ok, one more episode of TV”, when I’m doing something for me…guilt!
3) I blog about how I’m trying to improve our nutrition at home. Yet, I have served my daughter ice cream for lunch at home once. She was in a bad mood, and I just needed it to end!!!
By the way — I like Merrie’s comment about how she wanted more time in the pool! lol!
This is a fun topic, Galit!
Veronica Samuels 🙂
Veronica, hi! Thanks so much for the note! LOL *So* been there with the ice cream as a meal! FUN is right! And I LOVE (Seriously LOVE) that you called this a FUN topic! You’re absolutely right! It’s nice to not take ourselves so seriously every once in awhile! Thanks for the note, Mama! 🙂
Galit, you’re such a super mom BECAUSE you’re willing to share the hard moments too. This is why I love the world of mom-blogging – we can share these crazy moments and feel like we’re not alone.
My mom fail this week? We’re on a 6 day road trip and left our toothbrushes at one of our stops (we were returning there the next night) and so instead of running around looking for a drugstore and new toothbrushes, I announced that we wouldn’t brush our teeth that night.
Yep, I did.
(Oh, and the kids actually cheered!)
Phyll, hi! Thanks so much for the note! OMG do I love that they CLAPPED! CLAPPED! Should I try it tonight? Just to try it?! 🙂 Excellent to hear from you, Mama! 🙂
Galit, you are so brave for sharing your flaws. I will share, only because you did, cause I don’t want to be alone either…It was a lazy day yesterday and I fed the family the not-so-nutritious popcorn for lunch.
I also forget to change the sheets until I notice something growing on them (only a slight exaggeration)
And my favorite times of day are also nap and bed time.
There…three of many. But I love it. I wouldn’t change being their mommy. Not for anything. I just need to change me a bit.
Kjersti, hi! Thanks for sharing your 3, too! I’m honored to not be alone with YOU! And for the record: I, for one, wouldn’t change you AT ALL! Thanks so, so much for your note!
I smiled through the whole post because I feel like I always have less than stellar mom moments! The potty training one not exactly. My oldest was potty trained by 2, and I was thrilled, until the summer came and I realized that my 2 year old had to go to the bathroom to pee every 20 minutes!!! What?! Anytime he saw water he had to pee! It got to the point that I told him to pee behind the shed just so I could stay in the pool for more than 10 minutes at a time! No not my best moment but he thought it was the coolest thing in the world and I got to sit in the pool for about 25 minutes before # 2 had to be done (in the house)! And I agree to number 1! Naptiime and bedtime are my FAVORITE times of the day!!!
Merrie, hi! Thanks so much for your note! Oh, how I love the staying in the pool reasoning! Listen, we Mamas have to do what we have to do, right?! 🙂 And btw, I can relate to the peeing all the freakin’ time! My second (Chloe) is like that. And public bathrooms? Hate them! *Sigh* I loved hearing from you, lady! 🙂
Oh my gosh, hahaha, what a great way to start my day! You are so right, if we don’t share, how do we know whether or not we’re the only ones that lysol their children’s clothes as they leave for school because there was not One. Single. CLEAN. piece of clothing in the house. Welcome! I look forward to getting to know you & your family!
*giggles* I’m still laughing ;D
~Amy
Oh my freaking God your comment was WAY funnier than my whole post! Love. It! Thank you for the warm welcome, I’m so excited to be a part of this community and for the record: That Lysol trick? Pure genius! 🙂
I know plenty of Moms who share those FAIL moments. Some have entire blogs centered around them. And, it is a common subject of discussion on Twitter. I think sharing those moments makes someone more real to me. None of us are perfect, and if we try to pretend we are, we fool no one.
Oh, and you are a great Mama! 🙂
Right back ‘atcha baby! Thank you so much for the note and I totally and completely agree: Sharing FAIL moments every once in awhile DEFINITELY serves to real-ify (??) each other & keeps us authentic. Excellent to hear from you, Elizabeth!!
Love! Love! Love!!!! What a fun read today as my child’s massive hulk-like tantrum got her a day off from school today. It was her biggest one to date and today I am out of regular coffee and was no match for the 7 year old hulk. Now that she is hanging out playing her DS I am feeling FAIL FAIL!!! I read this and got a good laugh!!!! We are all human 🙂 The PJ sledding idea is brilliant btw!!!! Thanks for the tip!!
Jen, hi! Thanks so much for the note! Hey we ALL need days at home sometimes and seriously? I couldn’t take on a stuffed animal much less a tantrum sans coffee! Excellent to hear from you and have a double espresso for me, will you?! 🙂
This is a delightful post! I’m not a mom, but I visit this blog for the “world” part, as I live and blog from Haiti.
But about your third failing as a mom–gotta share a story about my nephew and potty training. He was well along, wearing underware and all, when one day he had an accident. My sister asked him why he had “pooped in his big boy underware.” Johnny put his little hands on his hips, looked as his mother like she was a fool and declared, “It’s easier!”
Well that’s just plain GENIUS, isn’t it?! Love it!! Thanks so much for the note, Kathryn and I know *exactly* what you mean! The world part drew me in, too! 🙂
great post. made me think about thomas edison and his view on failure. he said he wishes he would have failed more because that meant he was taking risks, learning and living.
just like formula 409, making mistakes can lead to great discoveries. by the way, the name comes from the fact that it ws the 409th try at the “formula” love the perseverance. someone made multimillions by not quitting. moms and dads can do the say, just maybe not make $$$ doing it
LOVE the analogies Matt! So, so important to remember, model and live by! Thanks so much for the note! 🙂
I love this post! Sadly, I probably love it so much because I have way too many Fail moments. So many, infact, I really can’t pick just one to share. It’s nice to know that I am not alone. My most recent worse moment was when I volunteered Lil Wayne’s newest song to my 15 year old. Not the cleaned up version either, but in my defense, he would have found it on his own.
Love it, Margie! And I think you’re absolutely right: He DEFINITELY would have found it anyway! Thanks for the note, it was great hearing from you! 🙂
Oh I SO love this!!! I enjoy companionship in my failures! But where or where to begin….. graham crackers for breakfast…. allowing my children to eat nothing but Halloween candy for several days because I don’t want to fight about it…. telling my kid I can’t read that book to them because Mommy is rockin’ this game of Tetris on my iphone… or the real highlight of my mothering: leaving the room to go “cool off” and forgetting a knife on the kitchen counter. Yep, that one ended in a trip to the ER to patch up a finger.
I love my children with every fiber of my being and would give my life for them in a second. Most of the time I feel I do alright, but there is something very liberating about shouting your shame from the rooftops! Yep, we’re all human and there’s comfort in that!
Oh sweet Mary, I love your comment because it’s raw, real and authentic. We’ve ALL been there and it’s a lot less lonely, you know, THERE, together! And for the record: Graham crackers for breakfast is totally legit! Teach me how to play Tetris and maybe I’ll rock it, too! 🙂 Thanks so much for the note! 🙂
You’ll have to give me more than that to convince me you have moments of “mom fail” 🙂 I’ve lived in the cold country and know how exhausting it can be to un-layer a kid (pass) Jammys all day? I do the same if I’m not going out anywhere. They are comfortable and plus, you are conserving water(pass). Look forward to nap & bed time – why not? It’s the only time you are going to get something done, right? (pass). So, you get passes from me & I’m sure you will from your kids because I’ll bet you show them a lot of love in many other ways! For the record: I think being a parent is the hardest job in the world and the fact that you even feel concerned that you kinda suck at it means you do not (IMO). Great Post!
Kim, thank you so much for your kind, sweet words! They mean a lot to me! 🙂
We just moved, but at our former residence, I always let my son pee in the backyard when we were outside. The thing is, we lived super close to our neighbors…like looking at you on your deck when I am sitting on my deck close. It just wasn’t some big open private natural space, but I was too lazy to make him go inside. So like the neighbors’ dogs, my son marked our property.
Fab. We should all mark our property in one way or another, yes? I say sharpie marker, you say pee? LOL Love this so much, Tara! Thanks so much for the (Honest!) note!!
How refreshing to read your honest post!!! Your “Mom Fail #3” had me laughing out loud. My list could go on and on and on. Yesterday I put myself in time-out because I thought I would hurt someone. I ended up falling asleep and feeling much better when I awoke to my son napping and my daughter playing in her room. Thank God daddy was there to take over when I quit!
Kally, thanks so much for the note! AMEN to naps and Daddys taking over And can I just say, that I LOVE that you used the phrase, “When you quit?!” LOL Excellent to hear from you, Mama! 🙂
Great post – love the number 3 – living in Norway I can relate to the number of layers one wears in winter! Also glad to hear about how everybody is “failing” as it takes a lot of the pressure off (as I still consider myself a new mum, allthough the lad will be one tomorrow)!
Asta, hi! Thanks so much for your note! Happy Birthday to your little guy and thanks for feeling my necessity-for-layers pain! 🙂
Oh, and forgot to say that I am glad to hear that I am not the only one who looks forward to nap-time! 🙂