Letting go…
It seemed like it was just yesterday when I held my newborn 3.4kg baby in my arm (yes singular!), breastfed her every 2 hours and survived on not more than 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep. In a blink of an eye, she is now a feisty and energetic 2.5 year old who is ready to “do it myself!” as she likes to say.
It used to be that whenever I asked her to do something, she would do it cheerfully, even if it was to throw rubbish into the bin. Nowadays, however, it is almost impossible to get her to do anything if there’s nothing in it for her
Where did my innocent little angel disappear to?
You know how people say that mothers will go through a period of emptiness called the Empty Nest Syndrome when all the little chicks have grown up and left the home?
I haven’t reached that stage yet but at the rate that my baby is growing, I always hug her really tightly, kiss her all over her face and bite her juicy thighs because before you know it, she’s all grown up and won’t allow me to do all of that anymore. She will be all, “Mum it ain’t cool to kiss me, you’re embarrassing me!!” or “OMG mum that dress is sooo yesterday!”
*Sigh*
I think I’m suffering from Premature Empty Nest Syndrome (PENS).
Do you feel your kids are growing up too fast too? How do you cope with the feelings of letting go?
This is an original post to World Moms Blog from our writer, a research psychologist and mother of one in Singapore, Madeline Heng. You can find Madeline at her personal blog, MadPsychMum @ University of Motherhood.
Photo credit to iamkaspar. This photo has a creative commons attribution license.
I can so identify with this. My three year old scratches and hugs me to sleep (I call her my kitty cat). And today, she told me, I think no need to hug and she turned around and went to sleep on her own. I was stunned and it dawned on me that she may not need me around much anymore and it made me a little sad that she’s no longer a little babe anymore. I hope that she’ll never outgrow her need for me so I don’t know how I’ll cope if with letting go at this stage.
Yeah I know right? It was just yesterday that I was her everything! *sob*
I have heard parenting being described as ‘long days and short years’ – ain’t that the truth?!!
soooooooooo true!!!
Agreed! This is so true!
Yes, Karyn, exactly that – “long days and short years”!
My “baby” is nearly 17 years old and my 20 year old son has just come back from spending 2 weeks with his girlfriend in Germany! I’m afraid Empty Nest is “imminent” for me. I’m very fortunate though, my kids aren’t ashamed to hug and kiss me in public or to be my FB friends. In fact I’m FB friend with most of my kids’ closest friends. 🙂
We’ve recently bought a property that (apart from the main, 3 bedroom house) also has a 1 bedroom flatlet (where my son is currently staying) and a 2 bedroom cottage where my mom-in-law lives. My dream for the future is that one day at least one of my kids will choose to grow their own family in this home while we retire to the cottage. For us it would be the best of both worlds – independent yet really close to each other!
Unfortunately the old couple who sold us this property had the same plans for THEIR family, but it didn’t work out for them. Only the thought that it still MIGHT work out for us, is what is making the imminent Empty Nest bearable for me. I want to be close to my grandchildren one day!!
We are trying to do the same! Trying to stay near our parents so that we can take care of each other. Hopefully my kids will think the same way in future *cross fingers*
Hoping it will work out for you too 🙂
Madeline, I totally hear you on this one! My ‘baby’ just turned 3, and while it makes me so proud to see her become independent, it also makes me a little sad on the inside to know that my baby really isn’t a baby anymore!