ISRAEL: Part III of IV: Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer

ISRAEL: Part III of IV: Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer

Neta sat down with World Mom contributor, Susie Newday in Israel to talk about living her life with metastasis breast cancer.

Neta sat down with World Mom contributor, Susie Newday in Israel to talk about living her life with metastatic breast cancer.

This is part three of our contributor and cancer nurse, Susie Newday’s, moving and in-depth interview on breast cancer with her close friend. Grab a cup of something warm, and come be a fly on the wall with us, as two friends discuss living with metastatic breast cancer. There is something for us all to learn. (Click to catch up and read Part I and Part II.)

Susie: Your diagnosis changed your life. How did it change your life in practical terms?

Neta: When I was first diagnosed, it almost didn’t change my life at all. I had very few side effects from the treatment, and I continued to work. It was a total of nine months with surgery in the middle of those months. I had chemo, surgery and radiation. I started the treatments from a place of strength. I think that, strengthwise, I’m a strong person. I was almost never sick. I had a body image of a healthy, strong person.

I was always athletic and strong. I never felt weak. And suddenly you change from the healthiest person in your mind to the sickest person, who is getting chemo that weakens you. And you get shots and blood and everything else that’s involved. I continued to work during that whole period.

The principal in my school said to me that she had never seen anything like this, someone going through such strong chemo who continues to function like this.

I would miss work for the day of treatment and the day after, and then I would work the next two weeks until the next treatment. Also during the six weeks of radiation, I would do it after work in the afternoon. The work kept me going.  I would be very tired in the evening, but I continued to function more or less like normal. I worked a few less hours at work and managed to keep the house running more or less like normal. I did go to bed very early about 8 pm.

The only trauma was the hair loss. The kids took it very hard. They were very embarrassed for me to go around bald. All the kids, even the young ones, wanted me to wear some type of head covering. I had a wig.

I went to work with a wig, and whoever didn’t know about the cancer, didn’t realize. I was diagnosed over summer vacation, and I came back to work in September with a wig already. I didn’t hide it, but it took some people time to find out.

So, during the first bout of cancer I had a lot of energy, and I was lucky to have very few side effects.

S: Did you have nausea during your pregnancies? There seems to be a correlation between people who have nausea during pregnancy and nausea during chemo.

N: No I didn’t, and my doctor also said there is a correlation. I had very little nausea, if at all. As far as other side effects, I hated wearing the wig. It really itched me and was uncomfortable. The minute I was able to, I took it off and wore a head scarf.

S: Your trauma about the hair loss was because your kids took it hard, or was it something you yourself took hard?

N: It was also because of the kids and also because you don’t want anyone to know you are sick. I didn’t like the way I looked when I looked in the mirror, but I understood that it was something temporary, that it would grow back.

It was very hard for the kids. They didn’t want their friends to see me without a head covering. At home I didn’t wear a wig only a head scarf.

I only wore the wig to work and to special events. I think if it wasn’t for the kids asking me not to go without a head covering, I probably would have gone without anything.

S: When the cancer came back, how did you feel?

N: It was very hard. When it came back there were already metastases all over my bones. I had really bad back pain. I received radiation to my neck, but it didn’t help right away. It took time. In the beginning I had to wear a neck brace; initially, only for car rides; but then I had to wear it all the time. I was in terrible pain. For a few months I spent almost all day in bed, I couldn’t move. I could barely get up to go to the bathroom. It took a long time until I found the right pain medication regimen. So yes, things were different. I was in bed and everyone came to me.

S: How did you cope with such bad pain?

N: I remember I was in shock from the pain. I don’t know if I’m someone who doesn’t do the self-pity thing, but I do pity myself sometimes. The pain was so bad sometimes that I physically couldn’t do things, but I don’t remember having a feeling of being depressed.

Once again I summoned the energy. I had no choice. In my way of thinking, I had no choice. I have four children, and I can’t give up or take a time out from this world.

S: You did and do have a choice. You choose.

N: In my mindset, I have no choice. I have to cope, and I have for what to cope. I had to be strong because I have children and they need me, so I cope. My choice is to be here.

S: There is a lot of strength in knowing that you choose and that you are in the driver’s seat.

N: Even if it is a choice, it’s an automatic choice for me. I don’t stop to think, what am I going to do now?

S: That’s your mindset because your family and your kids are important to you.

N: I know that when some mothers are sick, thinking about the children and what will be with them can be depressing. For me, thinking about my children gives me a lot of strength because I want to be there for them. I want them to see that I can cope and that I can be there with them. Even when I was in bed all the time, the kids came to lay in bed next to me, and I read them books.

The kids are very important to me and they give me a lot of strength. They are what gives me the most strength. I love a lot of people in this world, friends and parents and family, but no one comes close to my kids in regards to their meaning in my life, in regards to my love for them, in regards to my commitment to them. The kids are just different. I choose to be there for them because I want what is best for them.

Because they give me so much strength, even when I was stuck lying in bed and not moving, I didn’t sink into a depression. I knew I had to fight. Maybe I am just a doing, practical type of person. I say to myself, this is what I have  to do now, and these are my priorities and that’s what I do. I do think about things. I do understand the significance. I choose my priorities and what’s most important, what’s worth fighting for and what I will invest my energy in. What’s less important will wait.

That’s something that has guided me this whole period. The strength is finding the things that give you strength, to understand what they are, to stick with them. If for me what’s important is that my children have a normal childhood without major traumas (as much as I am able to control), if that’s what’s close to my heart, I will fight for it. If it means that in order for that to happen that I have to do something like asking for help even if asking for help is not easy for me, I will do it.

I remember in the beginning how hard it was for me to ask for help. You find yourself in a place of weakness and no one wants to feel weak, and pathetic and in need of help. It’s a lot easier to be the one giving help. Once upon a time I didn’t understand how hard it is to ask for and receive help. Healthy people generally don’t ask for help. I have been helped so much that I feel like I want to give back to people what I can. If I hear someone needs something that I can help with, I try to help.

Even though receiving help is hard, when the other choice is not receiving the help and having my children hurt by that I take the help because I need my children to have the most normal life that they can. What keeps me going is trying to figure out how to create the most normal surroundings for my children. I’ve done everything I can to make things easier on my children. My community is amazing. We’ve had unbelievable generous help from our friends and community, and I’m not sure that is something that can be found everywhere. People cooked for us for months, and even now if I need help taking the kids anywhere or to run errands they help me. Now that my husband is sick as well, when he doesn’t feel well we need more help as well because all of a sudden everything falls on me.

S: Have you thought about hiring someone to help you?

N: I have thought about it. We had someone for a while but it’s not easy bringing someone else into the home. I have been trying to refrain from that. If I see that I have no choice, that’s what I’ll do.

S: Do you find that it’s taking a physical toll on you doing it all by yourself?

N: I’m tired all the time but that’s not something new. Actually when I know that I have to rise to the challenge for a few days, I surprise myself and have found the strength. I’m tired but I manage and I feel good that I was able to manage. It also keeps the stability of the dynamics in the house. I choose to function. I’m trying to keep things as normal as possible. It doesn’t do good when people are coming in and out all the time. It hurts the household routine.

If I need to bring in help I will. The kids also understand that if I bring someone in to help that means that my husband and I are not functioning anymore and it stresses them out. They ask “What? You can’t do it by yourself?”

Tune in soon for Part IV of this IV part “World Mom to World Mom” series on living with metastatic breast cancer.

Cancer can happen to everyone. Listen to your body, treat it well and educate yourself about cancer symptoms. Learn not just about breast cancer symptoms (which are varied) but also the symptoms of ovarian cancerGI cancerlung cancerpancreatic cancer and all the other cancers out there. Ask your parents about your family medical history. Do the recommended screening tests that are available to you because early detection of any cancer makes a hell of a difference.

Most of all enjoy every minute of your life because there are people out there who are dying for more time.

(For the full series: click here to read Part Iclick here to read Part IIclick here to read Part III and click here to read Part IV.)

This is an original post by World Moms Blog Africa & Middle East Regional Editor, Susie Newday in Israel. 

Photo credit to the author. 

 

Susie Newday (Israel)

Susie Newday is a happily-married American-born Israeli mother of five. She is an oncology nurse, blogger and avid amateur photographer. Most importantly, Susie is a happily married mother of five amazing kids from age 8-24 and soon to be a mother in law. (Which also makes her a chef, maid, tutor, chauffeur, launderer...) Susie's blog, New Day, New Lesson, is her attempt to help others and herself view the lessons life hands all of us in a positive light. She will also be the first to admit that blogging is great free therapy as well. Susie's hope for the world? Increasing kindness, tolerance and love. You can also follow her Facebook page New Day, New Lesson where she posts her unique photos with quotes as well as gift ideas.

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ISRAEL: Part III of IV: Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer

ISRAEL: Part II of IV: Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer

Neta sat down with World Mom contributor, Susie Newday in Israel to talk about living her life with metastasis breast cancer.

Neta sat down with World Mom contributor, Susie Newday in Israel to talk about living her life with metastasis breast cancer.

This is part two of our contributor and cancer nurse, Susie Newday’s, moving and in depth interview on breast cancer with her close friend. Grab a cup of something warm, and come be a fly on the wall with us, as two friends discuss living with metastatic breast cancer. There is something for us all to learn. (Click to catch up and read Part I, first.)

Susie: You know what I remember? I remember before I worked in oncology, when you were diagnosed for the first time. You were waiting for your scan results to see whether there was any metastases and you said to me, “If I have metastasis, my life is over.” When you were diagnosed with the recurrence was that the same feeling you had?

Neta: Yes, that was my feeling. I said to myself, I’m screwed. With metastasis you don’t recover. You get another year or two.

S: Or maybe longer.

N: I have to say that I have a hard time believing that. I don’t really see that in the cards.

S: I wish you many more years.

N: I wish. And I thank you very much, and I hope I do. I’m not saying I want to die, I don’t. I’ll be happy to be surprised for the good but the feeling is that this is the end.

S: You walk around with the feeling everyday?

N: Now it’s less. Since I lived through the setback I had with the bleeding in my brain, and everyone told me that I’m a medical miracle, I now say to myself that maybe there are miracles out there.

I am more open to the possibility that maybe there will be a miracle here, something I refused to believe beforehand when my cancer recurred.

S: Tell me what happened with your setback and the hospitalization.

N: When I was rediagnosed, I was receiving Aredia to strengthen my bones and a biological treatment that was part of a clinical trial. I went back to work. About two or three months after that I began having severe weakness. My hemoglobin kept going down and they decided to hospitalize me. My oncologist told me that the cancer has reached my bone marrow. I was hospitalized in the regular medical ward for a week and a half until space opened up in the oncology ward and then they moved me. I received blood transfusions and chemotherapy.

A day or two after I was moved, I started having confusion, and then I couldn’t see. For about 5 days I had what seemed like a gray veil over my eyes. I don’t remember much but they told me I was really confused, and they had to appoint a legal guardian to make my medical decisions. To do that I needed an interview with the psychiatrist. He asked me a lot of questions which I don’t remember,

but I do remember that he asked me how old my children were and I couldn’t tell him. I knew their names but not their ages.

My husband brought the kids to visit me, but afterwards he told me that it was a difficult decision whether or not to bring them because I couldn’t see, and they didn’t want the kids to get scared. He had consulted with the psychologist who said to bring them because it’s better for them to see their mother even if she is confused and doesn’t see than not to see her.

It was 5 very difficult days. They ran all kinds of tests from eye tests to an MRI. I remember being very afraid before the MRI. I remember them saying it’s a very important test to see what’s going on. Inside the machine everything was rotating, and there was a horrible noise. I remember it being very traumatic, also the MRI test itself and also the fact that I knew it was a very important test, and I didn’t know what they were looking for. After the fact, I now know they were looking for metastases in the brain. They didn’t find any, it was only a brain bleed, and then they said the situation is better than they thought.

I don’t remember everything from those days. I remember people coming to visit. I recognized the people who came.

Later on, I found out that my husband already prepared the older girls a bit to expect the worse. They said psalms, and no one really thought I was going to recover because my medical state was not good. Then on the fifth day I woke up in the morning, my mother came into the room, and I was able to see her.

The doctors came, and they did tests. My eyesight came back, but slowly. Even now I can see perfectly from far but my vision from close is still impaired and interferes with reading. But at least I see the world, I see things. I don’t need help walking.

Since that incident I say to myself maybe there is some kind of miracle going on here, maybe there is some kind of divine intervention. In the hospital everyone was saying they had never seen someone recuperate like I did with their eyesight returning. Maybe it had something to do with my willpower. After my husband was diagnosed, I realized why it was that I pulled through, why I’m still here. I’m here to organize things and take care of my family. It is much harder when both parents are ill. I couldn’t “go” and leave my husband here alone to also fight his disease and raise the children because it is impossible to do. Apparently someone up above realized that I’m still needed here. That’s the answer I give myself. No one has said that to me, I just feel it. No one has answers but after my husband was diagnosed with cancer I just understood why I am still here.

S: When was your husband diagnosed?

N: January 2013. He was admitted with a bowel obstruction and then was diagnosed with Metastatic Colon Cancer. He was diagnosed about 2-3 months after my prolonged hospitalization, and I hadn’t really recuperated yet. I had slowly been getting better. I would be hospitalized for a week or so and then released and then hospitalized again for a week. It was a big shock having another person in the family sick. When he wasn’t feeling well and needed to go to the Emergency Room I still wasn’t feeling great and I couldn’t drive. His brother came and picked him up.

S: What was going through your head when your husband was diagnosed?

N: That someone up above is crazy. It’s not just that I’m sick, and now he’s sick. It’s the fact that both of us are in a situation where the doctors are not optimistic. It’s not a situation where you can say to yourself that I will definitely beat this. It could be 1, 2 or 3 years. No one has any idea how long you have for sure. I said to myself and to God, why him? * He is such a good person. For sure he hasn’t sinned. Maybe I sinned unwittingly but him? With my husband it seemed like a different level, it was like he doesn’t deserve this. He is such a good person.

S: And you deserve it?

N: No. But HE is really a good person. He’s a better person than me. He has a good heart, he doesn’t hurt people. * I just couldn’t reconcile how it was possible that he could be sick because he didn’t deserve it because he is such a good person. You start saying to yourself that God went crazy. Is there no justice in the world? Two young parents with 4 children are both now sick. Something went wrong. Either God is putting us through some great trial or I don’t know what. It’s not fair. I felt very strongly that it was just not fair that he was sick too, it was enough that I was sick.

*(I went to get some tissues at this point for her, which were easy to find because as she said there are lots of tissues in her house.)

S: I think that women and especially mothers don’t see ourselves the way other people see us. We are very generous towards other but we don’t cut ourselves any slack. I’m flabbergasted how you’re talking about how your husband doesn’t deserve this to happen to him and you do? (We both started laughing at that point)

N: He is the kind of person who if you ask directions on how to get somewhere, even if it’s out-of-the-way he will take you there. I would try to explain, I would not take anyone all the way there.

S: What good things do you see in yourself, what things do you do that are good and that are unique to you?

N: I have more sensitivity to people. My husband doesn’t see certain things that I’m more intuitive about, also in life and also in work. Part of my job was to be sensitive to kids. I have more sensitivity to my surroundings which my husband might sometimes miss because he just doesn’t see it. I can be a good friend. As far as the kids, I’m more involved, I am with them more. I never said I don’t do good things. My husband is just good.

S: Were you always as involved with your kids or is it more since you have been sick?

N: It was always very important for me to be a mother, to be with the kids. The thing that stressed me out the most when I got sick was the kids, what’s going to be with the kids. I still struggle with that. I was always with them. After my births I took extended maternity leave. I saw motherhood as a very important role. I always had that, it’s not something that started now.

(For the full series: click here to read Part Iclick here to read Part IIclick here to read Part III and click here to read Part IV.)

This is an original post to World Moms Blog by our Africa and Middle East Editor, Susie Newday, in Israel. 

Photo credit to the author. 

 

Susie Newday (Israel)

Susie Newday is a happily-married American-born Israeli mother of five. She is an oncology nurse, blogger and avid amateur photographer. Most importantly, Susie is a happily married mother of five amazing kids from age 8-24 and soon to be a mother in law. (Which also makes her a chef, maid, tutor, chauffeur, launderer...) Susie's blog, New Day, New Lesson, is her attempt to help others and herself view the lessons life hands all of us in a positive light. She will also be the first to admit that blogging is great free therapy as well. Susie's hope for the world? Increasing kindness, tolerance and love. You can also follow her Facebook page New Day, New Lesson where she posts her unique photos with quotes as well as gift ideas.

More Posts - Website

Follow Me:
TwitterFacebookPinterestGoogle PlusYouTube

NEW JERSEY, USA: Goodbye Mr. Peanut

NEW JERSEY, USA: Goodbye Mr. Peanut

2713385639_2a3fbd9c2bLast summer I was enjoying some peanut butter with my two year old son. It was the first time he really ate a decent amount and I was excited because he was such a picky eater and this would be a new food for him to enjoy. I had tested out giving him peanut butter three other times and he seemed to tolerate it fine. Each time he only had about a teaspoon and I closely watched him afterwards to see if there was a reaction.

However, this time, after about 20 minutes, I started to notice his lips swell and he got a blotchy rash on his cheeks and chin.

I immediately gave him Benadryl and then I Googled “peanut butter allergy.” All of the websites I came across listed lip swelling as one of the potentially life-threatening allergic reactions and a symptom of anaphylactic shock. I immediately called the doctor’s hotline since it was the weekend. I spoke to the doctor on call and he said as long as I gave him Benadryl and his breathing was fine that he should be okay. I still wonder if that was the right advice but we were fortunate that the Benadryl immediately alleviated his symptoms.

The next day I called to make an appointment to get him tested at the allergist. I was nervous but optimistic that maybe it was something else and not the peanut butter. After all, I gave it to him several times before and he seemed fine. Perhaps this was a fluke reaction to something else he may have picked up off the floor. I thought about the possibility of being “one of those peanut moms,” and held onto the optimism that my son would not have a peanut allergy. Looking back, I think of my ignorance as well as denial and wonder why I was so closed minded on the topic.

Sure enough, after my brave little guy got pricked in the back multiple times – I heard the dreaded diagnosis: “Your son is allergic to peanuts and tested at the highest end of the range, level 4.” My heart sank and I started to ask all of the usual questions:  “What do I now? How does an Epi-pen work? Is he allergic to anything else and most importantly, will he ever grow out of it?”

No PeanutsThe first answer was an overview on how to avoid peanuts by eliminating the food, reading labels, asking questions at restaurants and the importance of making sure that everyone who cares for your child knows about their allergy and what measures to take if they ingest peanuts or have a reaction. Then the doctor showed me how to use an Epi-Pen and explained that the box would come with a tester that I could practice with on an orange. As for other allergies, my son did not test positive for any other food groups or animals – just a mild allergy to dust and mold. Lastly, the doctor said that there was a 20% chance he could grow out of it, but not that likely.

I left the office with a feeling of dread and to be honest, at that moment I felt pretty depressed. When I told my husband and my family, their first response was “Oh, he’ll grow out of it.” As if the allergy was not real or that it would disappear as time went on. I know they did not mean it that way, they were trying to alleviate my concern, but it almost felt like someone was telling me his new diagnosis was not real. I started to think of what a severe allergy meant and how it would affect treats, birthday parties, holidays, eating out and the fact that my child would be one of those kids in the lunchroom at the “peanut free table.”

I decided to post a comment on Facebook asking for tips and ideas from anyone else who had a child with a peanut allergy. I couldn’t believe how many of my friend’s children had it and I never knew. They gave me so many awesome tips, links to allergy websites, as well as lists of which cookies and snacks were safe. I immediately felt so much better and knew that if they could deal with it with such confidence, I would be able to as well. Time and time again, the best support in life comes from other mothers!

Since the diagnosis, I have dealt with the usual frustrations that “allergy parents” have. Constantly reminding family members to check labels before feeding your child when in their care, following your child around at birthday parties making sure they don’t eat anything off of a table, bringing your own snacks or treats to events and restaurants, having panic attacks when you go for a quick ride or a day out and realize the Epi-pen is in your other bag at home and lastly – explaining over and over again that peanut allergies are real and my child can die if they have peanuts!

At times, you feel like the crazy person, the exaggerator, the neurotic one. The bottom line is that my child is my number one priority and so is their life. I really don’t care what anyone thinks!

As mothers, we all have something to worry about. I have met many other moms with children who have allergies, and they have it much worse than my son. There are many children who can’t eat wheat, milk and eggs – common ingredients in many of the basic foods out there. I find that much harder to manage than a simple peanut. I actually consider us very lucky that he is only allergic to one thing. Dealing with allergies can be stressful but is also manageable, at least for right now. I am nervous for the future and most days I try not to let it preoccupy our lives. I wonder if my one year old daughter will have it too. I cross my fingers and hang on to the hope that he will fall into the 20% of children that outgrow it. But at the end of the day, my child is happy and healthy and that is most important in life. What more can we ask for?

Do any of your children have allergies? What are the biggest challenges you have encountered with managing an allergy?

This is an original post to World Moms Blog by Wall Street Mama of New Jersey, USA.

Mr. Peanut photo credit to Tomas Fano.  No peanuts allergy alert pendant photo credit to BeInspiredDesigns.  Both photos have a creative commons attribute license.

Wall Street Mama (USA)

Wall Street Mama was born and raised in the suburbs of Chicago and moved to NJ when she was a teenager. She fell in love with New York City and set her mind to one thing after college – working on Wall Street. She has spent the last 16 years working on the trading floor at three major banks. As an Institutional Salesperson, she is responsible for helping large corporations and money funds invest their short term cash in the fixed income part of the market. She lives in the suburbs of central NJ with her husband of 11 years, their amazing 21 month old boy and their first baby – a very spoiled Maltese. She has baby #2 on the way and is expecting a little girl in June 2012. She is a full time working mother and struggles with “having it all” while wondering if that is even possible. Wall Street Mama was married at the age of 25 but waited to have children because she felt she was too focused on her career which required a lot of traveling and entertaining. When she was finally ready, she thought she could plan the exact month she was ready to have a child, like everything else she planned in her life. She was shocked and frustrated when things did not go according to her plan. Fast forward four years later, after a miscarriage and several rounds of failed fertility injections, her little miracle was conceived naturally. She never thought in a million years, that she and her husband would be in their late 30’s by the time they had their first child. Since the financial crisis of 2008, she has endured some of the most difficult years of her life. The stress of trying to conceive was combined with some of life’s biggest challenges. She and her husband, who is a trader, both lost their jobs on Wall Street the exact same month. Her mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer and she ended up passing away while she was 6 months pregnant. At times it didn’t seem like things would ever get better, but she has learned that life is cyclical and what comes down must again go up. Leaving her baby boy with a wonderful nanny each day is difficult, but at times it is easier than she would have expected. She still enjoys the seemingly addictive draw of working on Wall Street. The past few years have been dramatically different from the “good days” but she is focused on trying to achieve what she once had before. She is currently working on launching her own blog, Wall Street Mama, in an attempt to guide others who are focused on continuing their career, yet struggle with leaving their little ones at home. She is weathering the ups and downs of the market and motherhood, one day at a time.

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ONTARIO, CANADA: Time

ONTARIO, CANADA: Time

Toronto Traffic JamParents watch their child grow and exclaim that ‘Time flies!’ Or, on those endless afternoons where the cranky and over tired toddler simply will not nap, time drags on for an eternity.

As former residents of a major city and newcomers to Smalltown, Ontario, we’re adjusting to a different type of time – time without traffic.

Oh sure, we have traffic. Cars, trucks and boats (on trailers) go up and down the streets. And a friend told me about parents of kids at a school in the next town over picking up their kids on snowmobiles, but it’s a different kind of traffic than the choking gridlock that paralyses the Greater Toronto Area on a daily basis.

Our family is adjusting to life without traffic and on a more reasonable timeline, which only highlights how ridiculous our city life was. Two working parents with two kids in two different daycare facilities meant that we had to leave our home by 6:20 am every weekday to make the prerequisite drops just before squeaking into work just on time.

This meant the kids had to be up by 5:30 am to eat breakfast and stumble into clothes for the day. The birds weren’t even up! No wonder my oldest had serious behaviour issues – poor guy was exhausted.

Now as our family has grown to three children ages 6 and under, we’ve streamlined our efforts. One parent stays home, the other goes to work. Oh, and the oldest still has to be at school shortly after 8:00 am. Adding two children with special needs – with different therapist appointments and medical visits, and you have one busy family with serious time management issues. We’d have to drive for about 45 minutes (one way) to make those medical appointments (which were in the same city as we were; only traffic slowed you down to a crawl). So our family got used to leaving to go anywhere about an hour early.

Life in Smalltown, Ontario sure is different. If I drove for 45 minutes here I’d be in another township (or two)! Hubby and I find we do more in less time, and actually enjoy our drive through the town’s streets. A recent major shopping trip (one of those big box adventures, that required you to pick up stuff at other stores because it’s on sale) found Hubby and I sitting down for lunch with our toddler, wondering what to do with the rest of the day. We’d done a month’s worth of shopping in less than three hours, and been at three different stores too!

This is in sharp contrast to our city life, where lunch is a slice of pizza gobbled by kids strapped in car seats as a parent races to the next appointment or errand, all in an effort to save time. I’m not even going to talk about quality of life here. Check out my post, the Busy, Busy Month of May for more on this one. But back to time.

My daily commute is a perfect example of how time creeps away. Last year, for the first time in ten years my commute was under 20 minutes – without traffic. For ten years I’d been driving for an hour or more to work, and an hour or more from work. Around two hours each day, spent in my car. For ten years.

It makes me sick thinking about how much time was wasted, sitting and waiting for the car in front of me to move. Never mind the delays of an accident or construction – even my little 20 minute commute would balloon to over an hour if there was construction. (Which, as GTA residents will tell you, is nearly constant in summer time.) So as a family that has dealt with time-sucking gridlock, we love the freedom and new found time life in Smalltown brings.  The kids are happy, parents are happy, we’re all relaxed and so much less stressed.

Some of the things we’ve been doing include:

  • Spending time outdoors: Playing in the backyard kiddie pool after school! Playing in the backyard BEFORE school (unheard of!) Enjoying the fresh air and sunshine, instead of watching videos constantly.  In the winter we’ll be outside playing in the snow.
  • Visiting local Farmer’s Markets, Pow Wows and festivals.
  • Becoming active in the community – the library, museum, YMCA and Sports Complex and Ontario Early Years Centre are only a short walk away.

I just signed up the oldest for Boy Scouts (Beavers, actually for his age group) and my daughter for dance classes – all on weeknights, and all only a short drive or walk away. I wouldn’t even dream of this in the city. We’re doing more, with less.

In short, we’re living life, on our own time.

What do you do to save time or make the best use of your time in your day?

Angela blogs about her super-powered, special needs family at halfpastnormal.  They’re recently moved from Toronto, Canada to a small town in Ontario.

Toronto traffic jam photo credit to James D. Schwartz.  This photo has a creative commons attribute license.

specialneedmom2

Angela is a Special Education teacher who blogs about her super-powered special needs family. She has a 3 year old with Prader-Willi Syndrome and a 5 year old with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy and Sensory Processing Disorder. The odds of these random genetic events occurring at the same time are astronomical. "When you add our typically developing one year old baby boy to the mix, you have a very busy household!", she explains. Angela admits to having too many appointments, too many school problems, and being generally too busy as she tries to live life to the fullest. Please visit her family at Half Past Normal for more of their adventures! If you want to connect to chat, you can find her on Twitter @specialneedmom2 If you are interested in Special Education policies and procedures in Ontario – or just some excellent strategies and accommodations – please check out Angela's other site at Special Ed on the Bell Curve.

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EGYPT: What Can I Do with My Life?

EGYPT: What Can I Do with My Life?

ID-10086141Writing this post was the most challenging of all the posts I’ve ever written.  You may not find it that valuable, but I will still go with writing and publishing it. Actually I wanted and needed to write, but I didn’t know what exactly I wanted to share it.  My thoughts and my mind are a real mess.

Since the beginning of the 2013, life was really hard for me. First, I lost my father, and although I was accepting this fact and apparently I was calm, I was unaware that I was plunging into depression. It took me five months to realize it and accept the idea that I needed therapy.  When I started to feel better, the situation in Egypt deteriorated, and we were under curfew for months. I was imprisoned at home and rarely went out. I lost interest in everything except the political talk shows, but later on I realized that was the main cause of my feeling down and fearful most of the time.  I totally lost motivation to do anything and lost interest in anything.  All I wanted was to stay still and silent for hours. (more…)

Nihad

Nihad is an Egyptian woman, who was born and has lived her whole life in Alexandria, Egypt. She says, “People who visited this city know how charming and beautiful this city is. Although I love every city in Egypt, Alexandria is the one I love the most.” She is a software engineer and has worked in the field for more than twenty years. But recently she quit her job, got a coaching certificate and she is now a self employed life and career coach. She says, “I believe that women in this era face big challenges and they are taking huge responsibilities. That's why I have chosen my niche -- women looking for happiness and satisfaction. I help and support them in making whatever change (career change, life change, behavior change, belief change…) they want to bring more satisfaction and happiness in their lives.” Nihad is a mother of two lovely boys, 15 and 9 years old. She states, “They are the most precious gifts I have ever had. I madly love them, and I consider them the main source of happiness in my life.” Our inspiring mother in Egypt can also be found at Aurora Beams Life Coaching.

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WORLD POLIO DAY: Actions You Can Take to Help Eradicate Polio

WORLD POLIO DAY: Actions You Can Take to Help Eradicate Polio

This Close to Eradicating Polio

A UN Foundation Shot@Life delegation to Uganda, including World Moms, Jennifer Burden and LaShaun Martin, shows we are “this close” to eradicating polio worldwide. — October 2012

According to the U.S. Center for Disease Control,

“The eradication of polio from the western hemisphere is among the most significant public health achievements of all time, but victory over polio cannot be claimed until the entire world is made safe from the disease, and that is the commitment the global public health community has made.”

What is polio?

“Polio is a crippling and potentially deadly infectious disease caused by a virus that spreads from person to person invading the brain and spinal cord and causing paralysis.” — US CDC

Is there a cure for polio?

“Because polio has no cure, vaccination is the best way to protect yourself and the only way to stop the disease from spreading. The spread of polio has never stopped in Afghanistan, Nigeria and Pakistan. Poliovirus has been reintroduced and continues to spread in Chad and Horn of Africa after the spread of the virus was previously stopped.

In the late 1940s to the early 1950s, in the United States alone, polio crippled around 35,000 people each year making it one of the most feared diseases of the twentieth century. By 1979 the country became polio free.” — US CDC

Shot@Life & The GAVI Alliance

The protection of the global population, especially children, from such horrid diseases motivates our volunteerism with the UN Foundation’s Shot@Life campaign and the GAVI Alliance.  Shot@Life rallies Americans in support of life-saving vaccines for children in the developing world, and sends monetary support organizations on the ground administering the vaccines, such as the GAVI Alliance.

“These diseases are only a plane ride away.” — Dr. Meg Fisher  of American Academy of Pediatrics

What Can You Do to Help?

Join World Moms Blog in our movement to help protect the children who need it most, and help eradicate diseases, such as polio.

1) Donate to Shot@Life.  Did you know $20 fully vaccinates a child from the 4 leading causes of death of children under 5 years old — polio, measles, rotavirus and pneumonia? And only $1 pays for a polio vaccination.

2) Throw a GAVI Global Tea Party to raise awareness. Did you know you can use these tips from the World Moms about how to have interesting discussions with your friends and family on one of the leading global health solutions?

3) Join the #endpolionow Twitter Party tonight at 8pm-9pm EST tonight, Thursday, October 24th. Shot@Life Champions are taking to twitter tonight in support of polio eradication, and we’ll be there, too, making some noise!

4) Share this post and read our posts on our journey with Shot@Life to Uganda.  There, we observed UNICEF’s Family Health Days, which administer life-saving vaccines to children under 5 years old.

Day 1: UNICEF Offices in Kampala Debrief

Day 2: Family Health Day in Mumbende, Uganda

Day 3: Signs of Poverty

Day 4: Family Health Day in Kabarole, Uganda

Do all 4, do 1 — whatever you can do. Help us help children and help eradicate polio worldwide!  

This is an original post by World Mom, Jennifer Burden. 

Photo credit to Stuart Ramson of the UN Foundation. 

 

 

 

Jennifer Burden

Jennifer Burden is the Founder and CEO of World Moms Network, an award winning website on global motherhood, culture, human rights and social good. World Moms Network writes from over 30 countries, has over 70 contributors and was listed by Forbes as one of the “Best 100 Websites for Women”, named a “must read” by The New York Times, and was recommended by The Times of India. She was also invited to Uganda to view UNICEF’s family health programs with Shot@Life and was previously named a “Global Influencer Fellow” and “Social Media Fellow” by the UN Foundation. Jennifer was invited to the White House twice, including as a nominated "Changemaker" for the State of the World Women Summit. She also participated in the One Campaign’s first AYA Summit on the topic of women and girl empowerment and organized and spoke on an international panel at the World Bank in Washington, DC on the importance of a universal education for all girls. Her writing has been featured by Baby Center, Huffington Post, ONE.org, the UN Foundation’s Shot@Life, and The Gates Foundation’s “Impatient Optimists.” She is currently a candidate in Columbia University's School of International and Public Affairs in the Executive Masters of Public Affairs program, where she hopes to further her study of global policies affecting women and girls. Jennifer can be found on Twitter @JenniferBurden.

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