MASSACHUSETTS, USA: What Does Mommy Want to Be When You Grow Up?

MASSACHUSETTS, USA: What Does Mommy Want to Be When You Grow Up?

When I get together with fellow moms these days, I find the greatest thing we have in common is not that we all have kids but that most of us are still trying to figure out who we are now that we HAVE kids.

I think this is because our generation of moms is facing an identity crisis: Torn between the modern women that our foremothers fought so hard to enable us to become and the traditional women society has molded us into being.

A sesquicentennial ago, our foremothers fought to give us a voice in politics with the women’s suffrage movement. Fifty years ago, women struggled to break the academic barrier and make a college education, rather than a wedding ceremony, the social norm after finishing high school. The generation before us sacrificed spending much time with their families, or sometimes having a family at all, in order to prove their value as leaders in the work place.

But what about our generation? What’s our legacy? (more…)

Kyla P'an (Portugal)

Kyla was born in suburban Philadelphia but spent most of her time growing up in New England. She took her first big, solo-trip at age 14, when she traveled to visit a friend on a small Greek island. Since then, travels have included: three months on the European rails, three years studying and working in Japan, and nine months taking the slow route back from Japan to the US when she was done. In addition to her work as Managing Editor of World Moms Network, Kyla is a freelance writer, copy editor, recovering triathlete and occasional blogger. Until recently, she and her husband resided outside of Boston, Massachusetts, where they were raising two spunky kids, two frisky cats, a snail, a fish and a snake. They now live outside of Lisbon, Portugal with two spunky teens and three frisky cats. You can read more about Kyla’s outlook on the world and parenting on her personal blogs, Growing Muses And Muses Where We Go

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NEVADA, USA: Taking Things Slow as a Single Mom

NEVADA, USA: Taking Things Slow as a Single Mom

My 5-year-old son has been making a lot of comments lately about my relationship with my boyfriend. He has asked him – a few times – if he’ll be his stepdad. He’s mentioned the boyfriend moving in with us. He’s trying to make this relationship move forward a lot quicker than I’m comfortable with.

The thing is, I’ve never lived by myself. I went from my parent’s home to roommates in the dorm; from apartments with friends to an apartment with a boyfriend, and finally, to a condo with my husband. When my ex-husband moved out, it was the closest I got to living by myself. I was a joint custody single mom, so I lived with my son half the time, but there was still that time when it was just me. Even when I became a sole custody single mom, I never let go of that feeling of living “on my own,” even if I was never actually alone.

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Roxanne (USA)

Roxanne is a single mother to a 9-year-old superhero (who was born 7 weeks premature), living in the biggest little city and blogging all about her journey at Unintentionally Brilliant. She works as a Program Coordinator for the NevadaTeach program at the University of Nevada, Reno. Roxanne has a B.A. in English from Sierra Nevada College. She has about 5 novels in progress and dreams about completing one before her son goes to high school.

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NEW YORK, USA: Olympic Hopefuls? Probably Not…and That’s OK!

NEW YORK, USA: Olympic Hopefuls? Probably Not…and That’s OK!

As I sit here watching the U.S. Olympic team trials, I am thinking about all the work these hopefuls have put into getting to this amazing place. They are all so young; the gymnasts are 16…mere children! Two of the swimmers competing for the “women’s” 50-free are 14 and 15. Michael Phelps is considered mature – he’s 27!

I smile as a swimmer jumps out of the pool and runs over to hug her mother as she makes the U.S. team. I choke up as the camera pans to a very proud mom who watches her daughter do an amazing floor routine, which seals her fate as a competitor to represent the U.S. in London. As the commercial says, none of them could have gotten to this place without their mothers. It was probably their mom who ran them to the early morning and after school practices, who hugged them when they didn’t win and encouraged them to just do their best. It was their mom who celebrated their victories (I’m sure there were many) as they progressed to get to this amazing point in their career.

I sit here wondering if I would be able to do that for my children. How do you even start your child on the road to be an Olympic hopeful? In New York City, there are so many sports available to children starting at such a young age. My son, who is 5, has already tried  soccer, gymnastics, t-ball, and swimming. He has taken guitar and language lessons, art and music. When he starts Kindergarden in September, he will add martial arts to the list. I keep asking him if he wants to keep doing a certain sport, or try a new one, and inevitably his answer (for the most part) is to try a new one.

They showed some videos of the gymnasts doing routines as 5- and 6-year-olds, which means at my son’s age they were already on the road to the Olympics. I’m not capable of being a mom that “pushes” her children, but how else could they become the best in the world?

Don’t get me wrong. I would be that mom who takes her children to all of the practices, early morning and in the evenings. I would be the one who would console a loss and praise a win, who would mend an injury and be the biggest cheerleader on the sidelines. I just don’t know if I would be able to identify that my child was so gifted in a specific sport that they should seriously compete.

When my son was 3, we joked that he would be the next Michael Phelps. He loved his swim classes, and had a long and lean body. But being in New York, with cold winters, we did not continue his lessons once it got cold out. One thing led to another, and we haven’t really started them up again. I now ask myself, did we miss his chance to realize his full potential?

Now, I’m not expecting my children to make it to the Olympics. What I am asking, is what if there is a sport or activity (dance, a musical instrument, chess club, etc) that they are naturally gifted at, and, as a mother I don’t come across it? How do we, as parents, nurture our children to their full potential if we don’t figure it out?

I know enough to realize that I don’t have the answer.  I want to be able to help my children find their natural abilities; I want them to try everything until they find something that they really love.  And then I hope that I will be able to keep sending them to lessons/practice/rehearsals.  I hope that I can help them be the best that they can be, and help them reach for the stars…if that’s what they want to do.

Have you noticed a natural ability/talent in your child?  How have you nourished and supported them?

This is an original post for World Moms Blog by Maman Aya of New York City, USA.

Photo credit to Andrew Evans. This photo holds a Flickr Creative Commons attribution license.

Maman Aya (USA)

Maman Aya is a full-time working mother of 2 beautiful children, a son who is 6 and a daughter who is two. She is raising her children in the high-pressure city of New York within a bilingual and multi-religious home. Aya was born in Canada to a French mother who then swiftly whisked her away to NYC, where she grew up and spent most of her life. She was raised following Jewish traditions and married an Irish Catholic American who doesn’t speak any other language (which did not go over too well with her mother), but who is learning French through his children. Aya enjoys her job but feels “mommy guilt” while at work. She is lucky to have the flexibility to work from home on Thursdays and recently decided to change her schedule to have “mommy Fridays”, but still feels torn about her time away from her babies. Maman Aya is not a writer by any stretch of the imagination, but has been drawn in by the mothers who write for World Moms Blog. She looks forward to joining the team and trying her hand at writing!

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CALIFORNIA, USA: (Extended) Family Holiday

CALIFORNIA, USA: (Extended) Family Holiday

On the beach in a small town in Delaware (USA), sits a little house. Basically untouched from the day it was built. That house belonged to my husband’s fraternal grandparents and we are thankful that it still remains in the hands of family today.

This year we went on our first multi-generational family vacation. It included husbands and wives, sons and daughters, grandmothers and grandfathers. All under one roof.

My husband often tells me stories from his childhood of summer time at “the beach house”, as he refers to it. His memories include walking to town for ice cream, playing mini-golf with his friends, fishing with his dad and brother. This year, we were fortunate enough to spend an extended amount of time on the East Coast (we live in San Francisco, CA) and vacation for a week at the beach house. (more…)

Angela Y (USA)

Angela Y. is in her mid-thirties and attempting to raise her two daughters (big girl, R, 3 years; little girl, M, 1 year) with her husband in San Francisco, CA. After spending ten years climbing the corporate ladder, she traded it all in to be a stay-at-home mom! Her perspective of raising a child in the city is definitely different from those who have been city dwellers all their lives, as she grew up in rural Northeastern Pennsylvania (NEPA) surrounded by her extended family. Angela Y. and her husband are on their own on the west coast of the United States — the only family help they receive is when someone comes for a visit. But, the lifestyle in San Francisco is like no other for them, so there, they stay! This exercise conscious mom is easily recognized, especially when she is riding around her husband-built bike with two seats on the back. And, when she’s not hanging out with the girls, you can find Angela Y. in the kitchen. She loves to cook for her family, especially dessert, and then eats some herself when no one is looking! Sneaky, mom!

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TEXAS, USA:  Getting Help as a WAHM

TEXAS, USA: Getting Help as a WAHM

Bella waiting for her sitter.

I have been a stay at home mom for the past 2+ years with my daughter. And the only time we ever had a sitter was when my husband was gone for training with the Army for 4 months and I hired a girl to come once a week so I could grocery shop. So really, Bella has been pretty much my sidekick 24-7.

This past spring, I transitioned into what I’ve always dreamed of and worked towards – working at home as a freelance writer. These past two months I’ve worked 30-40 hours per week from home with several different jobs and my own blog.

This is a huge adjustment for our whole family – especially my daughter. When I realized I simply wasn’t able to get what I needed done without her being left alone or plopped in front of the TV, I decided to look at other options. (more…)

Diana

Diana blogs on raising a toddler daughter, the loss of her twin boys, and their families' adoption in progress on the aptly named Hormonal Imbalances, as well as Babble, Oreck, World Moms Blog, and Attachment Parenting International. She's been syndicated on BlogHer and The Huffington Post. Smaller glimpses into her day are on Twitter and Facebook, and on <a href="http://pinterest.com/lifeasasahm"

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CANADA: Excuse Me, Are You Being Rude? I Can’t Tell, I’m Canadian

They say that Canadians are polite. It’s part of our national image. Mostly, though, it’s Americans who say it, and it makes me wonder – does it follow that Americans are ruder?

Some people seem to think so, but I don’t notice much of a difference when we cross the border.

There isn’t much of an accent difference between the province of British Columbia and the state of Washington and the geography is pretty much the same. Then someone says something casually… and I see where Canadians and Americans differ.

“Pull the car closer to the curb.”

It was spoken by our Park-and-Ride attendant. We were getting ready for our trip to Vegas and flying out of Bellingham, Washington, which is about an hour drive from our home. The attendant was a young, friendly guy who looked like Jake Gyllenhaal’s less attractive cousin. He was personable and, yes, polite through all of our interactions.

But his directions felt rude. (more…)

Carol (Canada)

Carol from If By Yes has lived in four different Canadian provinces as well as the Caribbean. Now she lives in Vancouver, working a full time job at a vet clinic, training dogs on the side, and raising her son and daughter to be good citizens of the world. Carol is known for wearing inside-out underwear, microwaving yoghurt, killing house plants, over-thinking the mundane, and pointing out grammatical errors in "Twilight". When not trying to wrestle her son down for a nap, Carol loves to read and write. Carol can also be found on her blog, If By Yes, and on Twitter @IfByYesTweets

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