by Kyla P'an (Portugal) | Aug 17, 2012 | Me-Time, SAHM, Technology, USA, Women's Rights, Working Mother, Writing, Younger Children
When I get together with fellow moms these days, I find the greatest thing we have in common is not that we all have kids but that most of us are still trying to figure out who we are now that we HAVE kids.
I think this is because our generation of moms is facing an identity crisis: Torn between the modern women that our foremothers fought so hard to enable us to become and the traditional women society has molded us into being.
A sesquicentennial ago, our foremothers fought to give us a voice in politics with the women’s suffrage movement. Fifty years ago, women struggled to break the academic barrier and make a college education, rather than a wedding ceremony, the social norm after finishing high school. The generation before us sacrificed spending much time with their families, or sometimes having a family at all, in order to prove their value as leaders in the work place.
But what about our generation? What’s our legacy? (more…)
Kyla was born in suburban Philadelphia but spent most of her time growing up in New England. She took her first big, solo-trip at age 14, when she traveled to visit a friend on a small Greek island. Since then, travels have included: three months on the European rails, three years studying and working in Japan, and nine months taking the slow route back from Japan to the US when she was done. In addition to her work as Managing Editor of World Moms Network, Kyla is a freelance writer, copy editor, recovering triathlete and occasional blogger. Until recently, she and her husband resided outside of Boston, Massachusetts, where they were raising two spunky kids, two frisky cats, a snail, a fish and a snake. They now live outside of Lisbon, Portugal with two spunky teens and three frisky cats. You can read more about Kyla’s outlook on the world and parenting on her personal blogs, Growing Muses And Muses Where We Go
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by Roxanne (USA) | Aug 14, 2012 | Kids, Motherhood, Parenting, Rox is Brilliant, Single Mother, Unintentionally Brilliant, USA, World Motherhood, Younger Children
My 5-year-old son has been making a lot of comments lately about my relationship with my boyfriend. He has asked him – a few times – if he’ll be his stepdad. He’s mentioned the boyfriend moving in with us. He’s trying to make this relationship move forward a lot quicker than I’m comfortable with.
The thing is, I’ve never lived by myself. I went from my parent’s home to roommates in the dorm; from apartments with friends to an apartment with a boyfriend, and finally, to a condo with my husband. When my ex-husband moved out, it was the closest I got to living by myself. I was a joint custody single mom, so I lived with my son half the time, but there was still that time when it was just me. Even when I became a sole custody single mom, I never let go of that feeling of living “on my own,” even if I was never actually alone.
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Roxanne is a single mother to a 9-year-old superhero (who was born 7 weeks premature), living in the biggest little city and blogging all about her journey at Unintentionally Brilliant. She works as a Program Coordinator for the NevadaTeach program at the University of Nevada, Reno. Roxanne has a B.A. in English from Sierra Nevada College. She has about 5 novels in progress and dreams about completing one before her son goes to high school.
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by travelladywithbaby | Aug 9, 2012 | Canada, Motherhood, World Motherhood
At the age of 19, I sat at my Father’s deathbed. I watched him battle and lose his life to cancer in a very short period of time. I live with nightmares of his disease, and I grieve over him daily. He never saw me graduate from University, met my husband, walked me down the aisle, or met my son.
My loss haunts me daily. I have spent years attempting to honor his life and his spirit, but his death defined my life and altered it forever.
The moment I knew I was pregnant, I knew I was going to have a baby boy. I had vivid dreams of him and my Father. I am not sure how I knew, but at our 5 month ultra sound, we were told it was a boy. I knew he would take my Father’s first name, and I knew that somehow, my Father was connected to him.
I am not a deeply religious person, nor am I regular church goer. I have a deep sense of spirituality, mostly from years of travelling. I never want my son to fear death, and I want him to celebrate life. (more…)
Travel Lady with Baby has never had two feet in one city for long, growing up as a diplomatic kid, bouncing around from one country to another became the norm. Born in Canada, but never feeling Canadian, rather a Hodge Podge of cultures and traditions, Mandarin was her first language, not English, and Spanish still comes out of her mouth when trying to speak French.
Travel Lady with Baby declared to her Father that a career in the U.N was her future, but settled for a career at Foreign Affairs on an intense U.N file. After several years of non-stop travel, and having never put up a picture on the wall, she and her husband threw caution to the wind and moved to Vancouver, B.C. to work on an Olympic file.
Vancouver brought, a dog, a baby boy and a life-altering event that changed everything. It was this event that made Travel Lady with Baby and her husband realize that Vancouver had run its course, so, naturally it was time to embark on another adventure.
Packing everything into a small storage space and giving up their condo, they got on a plane for two months to travel with their son. For the first time, they breathed, got perspective, became present as parents and realized what they wanted. Landing back in Vancouver solidified a business plan and a move to a small town in Quebec.
Now running a Sustainable Consulting and Promotions Company with her husband, re-learning French (yes, you do lose it if you don't use it), waking up to a toddler that has more energy than a soccer team, juggling clients, a household, research and marketing, and squeezing in blogging about travel has been nothing but exhilarating.
It is very likely that there is another move and way more travel in the near future, but at least this time, they finally put pictures up on the walls. Check out her personal blog, Travel Lady with Baby.
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by Maman Aya (USA) | Aug 8, 2012 | 2012, Competition, Exercise, Motherhood, Sports, USA, World Motherhood
As I sit here watching the U.S. Olympic team trials, I am thinking about all the work these hopefuls have put into getting to this amazing place. They are all so young; the gymnasts are 16…mere children! Two of the swimmers competing for the “women’s” 50-free are 14 and 15. Michael Phelps is considered mature – he’s 27!
I smile as a swimmer jumps out of the pool and runs over to hug her mother as she makes the U.S. team. I choke up as the camera pans to a very proud mom who watches her daughter do an amazing floor routine, which seals her fate as a competitor to represent the U.S. in London. As the commercial says, none of them could have gotten to this place without their mothers. It was probably their mom who ran them to the early morning and after school practices, who hugged them when they didn’t win and encouraged them to just do their best. It was their mom who celebrated their victories (I’m sure there were many) as they progressed to get to this amazing point in their career.
I sit here wondering if I would be able to do that for my children. How do you even start your child on the road to be an Olympic hopeful? In New York City, there are so many sports available to children starting at such a young age. My son, who is 5, has already tried soccer, gymnastics, t-ball, and swimming. He has taken guitar and language lessons, art and music. When he starts Kindergarden in September, he will add martial arts to the list. I keep asking him if he wants to keep doing a certain sport, or try a new one, and inevitably his answer (for the most part) is to try a new one.
They showed some videos of the gymnasts doing routines as 5- and 6-year-olds, which means at my son’s age they were already on the road to the Olympics. I’m not capable of being a mom that “pushes” her children, but how else could they become the best in the world?
Don’t get me wrong. I would be that mom who takes her children to all of the practices, early morning and in the evenings. I would be the one who would console a loss and praise a win, who would mend an injury and be the biggest cheerleader on the sidelines. I just don’t know if I would be able to identify that my child was so gifted in a specific sport that they should seriously compete.
When my son was 3, we joked that he would be the next Michael Phelps. He loved his swim classes, and had a long and lean body. But being in New York, with cold winters, we did not continue his lessons once it got cold out. One thing led to another, and we haven’t really started them up again. I now ask myself, did we miss his chance to realize his full potential?
Now, I’m not expecting my children to make it to the Olympics. What I am asking, is what if there is a sport or activity (dance, a musical instrument, chess club, etc) that they are naturally gifted at, and, as a mother I don’t come across it? How do we, as parents, nurture our children to their full potential if we don’t figure it out?
I know enough to realize that I don’t have the answer. I want to be able to help my children find their natural abilities; I want them to try everything until they find something that they really love. And then I hope that I will be able to keep sending them to lessons/practice/rehearsals. I hope that I can help them be the best that they can be, and help them reach for the stars…if that’s what they want to do.
Have you noticed a natural ability/talent in your child? How have you nourished and supported them?
This is an original post for World Moms Blog by Maman Aya of New York City, USA.
Photo credit to Andrew Evans. This photo holds a Flickr Creative Commons attribution license.
Maman Aya is a full-time working mother of 2 beautiful children, a son who is 6 and a daughter who is two. She is raising her children in the high-pressure city of New York within a bilingual and multi-religious home.
Aya was born in Canada to a French mother who then swiftly whisked her away to NYC, where she grew up and spent most of her life. She was raised following Jewish traditions and married an Irish Catholic American who doesn’t speak any other language (which did not go over too well with her mother), but who is learning French through his children. Aya enjoys her job but feels “mommy guilt” while at work. She is lucky to have the flexibility to work from home on Thursdays and recently decided to change her schedule to have “mommy Fridays”, but still feels torn about her time away from her babies. Maman Aya is not a writer by any stretch of the imagination, but has been drawn in by the mothers who write for World Moms Blog. She looks forward to joining the team and trying her hand at writing!
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by Angela Y (USA) | Aug 6, 2012 | 2012, Childhood, Family, Family Travel, Travel, Uncategorized, USA, Vacationing
On the beach in a small town in Delaware (USA), sits a little house. Basically untouched from the day it was built. That house belonged to my husband’s fraternal grandparents and we are thankful that it still remains in the hands of family today.
This year we went on our first multi-generational family vacation. It included husbands and wives, sons and daughters, grandmothers and grandfathers. All under one roof.
My husband often tells me stories from his childhood of summer time at “the beach house”, as he refers to it. His memories include walking to town for ice cream, playing mini-golf with his friends, fishing with his dad and brother. This year, we were fortunate enough to spend an extended amount of time on the East Coast (we live in San Francisco, CA) and vacation for a week at the beach house. (more…)
Angela Y. is in her mid-thirties and attempting to raise her two daughters (big girl, R, 3 years; little girl, M, 1 year) with her husband in San Francisco, CA. After spending ten years climbing the corporate ladder, she traded it all in to be a stay-at-home mom! Her perspective of raising a child in the city is definitely different from those who have been city dwellers all their lives, as she grew up in rural Northeastern Pennsylvania (NEPA) surrounded by her extended family.
Angela Y. and her husband are on their own on the west coast of the United States — the only family help they receive is when someone comes for a visit. But, the lifestyle in San Francisco is like no other for them, so there, they stay! This exercise conscious mom is easily recognized, especially when she is riding around her husband-built bike with two seats on the back. And, when she’s not hanging out with the girls, you can find Angela Y. in the kitchen. She loves to cook for her family, especially dessert, and then eats some herself when no one is looking! Sneaky, mom!
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by Salma (Canada) | Aug 3, 2012 | 2012, Canada, Family, Life Balance, Marriage, Parenting, Salma, Working Mother, World Moms Blog
Yesterday was a bad day, I cried because I didn’t know what else to do. The month of June was a crappy month-all of it. July showed some promise, but it blew away with the wind, I guess. I’m hoping that August will give me a break, but I’m not holding my breath. They say “behind (or beside) every successful man is a good (strong) woman…” I can’t agree or disagree with that statement, but I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately.
You see my husband relies on me for practically everything- it is our relationship- our life. When we left Toronto 1 year ago, I was right behind him picking up the pieces (packing, making plans & arrangements), AND leaving behind my friends and a job at one of the top universities in Canada. My husband never really caught a break in Toronto, and needed (for his sanity and mine) to leave and find something that would benefit our family- he found it in Calgary.
I never questioned it, because we never questioned our bond in accepting the inevitabilities of life. After all he left his family to live with me in a foreign land. Now that I have been out of my comfort zone for one year, I have to admit, I hate it. While my husband has gained success and is happier in this new city, I don’t fit- I just can’t seem to catch my breath.
Success is a funny thing, and that’s the problem. Even without meticulous calculations you could look at our lives here now compared to our life in Toronto and conclude the obvious- we have gained more success. We have more money in the bank; we just bought a house that, if purchased in Toronto, would be half a million dollars; our kids are growing up and staying out of trouble; and our marriage is stronger than ever- Thank God for all of this. So what’s the problem you ask? Read on! (more…)
An Imperfect Stepford Wife is what Salma describes herself as because she simply cannot get it right. She loves decorating, travelling, parenting,learning, writing, reading and cooking, She also delights in all things mischievous, simply because it drives her hubby crazy.
Salma has 2 daughters and a baby boy. The death of her first son in 2009 was very difficult, however, after the birth of her Rainbow baby in 2010 (one day after her birthday) she has made a commitment to laugh more and channel the innocence of youth through her children. She has blogged about her loss, her pregnancy with Rainbow, and Islamic life.
After relocating to Alberta with her husband in 2011 she has found new challenges and rewards- like buying their first house, and finding a rewarding career.
Her roots are tied to Jamaica, while her hubby is from Yemen. Their routes, however, have led them to Egypt and Canada, which is most interesting because their lives are filled with cultural and language barriers. Even though she earned a degree in Criminology, Salma's true passion is Social Work. She truly appreciates the beauty of the human race. She writes critical essays on topics such as feminism and the law, cultural relativity and the role of women in Islam and "the veil".
Salma works full-time, however, she believes that unless the imagination of a child is nourished, it will go to waste. She follows the philosophy of un-schooling and always finds time to teach and explore with her children. From this stance, she pushes her children to be passionate about every aspect of life, and to strive to be life-long learners and teachers. You can read about her at Chasing Rainbow.
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