by Katinka | Jul 28, 2014 | 2014, Adoption, Adoptive Parents, Being Thankful, Belgium, Birth Parents, Childhood, Contest, Cooking, Cultural Differences, Discipline, Ethiopia, Family, Food, Health, Kids, Life Balance, Motherhood, Multicultural, Nutrition, Parenting, Siblings, World Motherhood, Younger Children
I’ve yet to meet a mom who is not monitoring her kid’s eating habits. Some might even be obsessed over it, others just make sure their kids eat enough or don’t overeat. Food can be filled with cultural, health or moral values and seems an important subject in most families I know.
Every single one of the moms I know, seems to have her personal truth about food, or is at least searching for it. I know quite a few moms who vouch for strict vegetarianism, sugar free, all organic, low-carb, macrobiotic, low-fat or a mix of those. Others cook without lactose, gluten, sugar, eggs, nuts, soy and other allergy or intolerance boosters, by necessity or by conviction. But there’s also quite a number who just like to stick to their grandmothers’ favourite mashed potatoes with pork chops and piccalilli, because that’s what they were raised with.
Myself, I mix quite a bit of the above. My life is all about compromises. As a student, I used to be vegetarian, but now we eat vegetarian for only about 3 days a week. I also restrict the amount of lactose, because of my daughter’s (mild) intolerance. I make sure they eat at least one piece of fruit per day, but most days it’s two or three. And because we are Belgian, we have our two-weekly take out of ‘French’ fries, which originally came from Belgium. Or maybe even from Flanders.
I would not call myself obsessed, but I do keep a detailed mental track of what my kids eat in a day, and try to compensate by the 80/20 rule I adopted from a fellow World Mom: if they eat healthy for 80% of the time, that will make up for the 20% they eat junk.
When a mom has found her personal truth about food, obviously she wishes for her kids to eat by it; which they aren’t likely to do without a struggle. Not after they’ve tasted the Belgian fries, they won’t.
When my oldest was younger, I used to think I had it all together though. He ate whatever vegetable I gave him and his favourite dish was Brussels’ sprouts. I even recall quite some occasions on which I, the former vegetarian, bribed him into eating his meat by promising him an extra stem of broccoli. After a while, even the meat didn’t pose a problem anymore. He would eat whatever I served him.
Those good old days are over now.
It all started when our daughter arrived, age 2.5. She came from Ethiopia and was not used to our diet, not mentally, but also not physically. The first time I served her something green, she just threw it on the floor. Not out of a whim, but because she was clearly convinced it was not edible. She even tried to take it out of my mouth. Having been fed mashed dishes all her life, she was also not used to chewing. She did like bread and she did her best chewing it, but we had to take her to a physiotherapist to sooth her jaw pains. So we customized our cooking to her and introduced new stuff every once in a while. The one dish that never posed a problem was, indeed, our Belgian fries.
Meanwhile, our son, then 5, seemed to finally grasp that there was such a thing as rejecting food. I don’t know whether it was his sister’s example, the TV shows he started watching, his classmates or just normal evolution, but he started getting more selective each month. He also ate with his hands more often, just like his sister was used to. I went from having one kid with excellent eating habits to two picky, messy eaters.
After two years of convincing myself it was just a phase, this year I started implementing some strategies to get them to eat more balanced. Ultimately, what they were eating wasn’t all that bad but I was getting tired of the drama and the struggle to get them to eat what I believed was good for them. And most of all, I wanted them to develop the discipline to choose healthy by themselves, and not just because I ordered or rewarded them.
First, I tried the Yucky List. A colleague of mine had it at home, and it worked perfectly for her family. The idea is that it is only natural to have different tastes and that you don’t need to like everything. The concept is that each family member can have three dishes they really don’t like, on that list. When it is served, they are allowed to refuse it and have bread instead. Or hope for a mom who cooks two different dishes in advance. Of course over time, you can change your preferences but when a fourth dish you don’t like is served to you, you have to eat it, before you can put it on the list (replacing another).
It seemed promising but after a few weeks, the kids started to change their list about every other day. Way too many family dinners were filled with ‘I will put this on my yucky list for sure!’ and a lot of moaning and struggling, which didn’t really lighten the mood as I had hoped it would. We might pick it up again when they are older but for now, it doesn’t work for us.
After that, I changed my strategy to handing out a Yucky Coupon, Bah Bon in Dutch. I borrowed the idea from a friend who used to do cooking for youth camps. At these camps, each of the kids was given one Bah Bon for the duration of the camp. They could hand it in if they didn’t want to eat one of the meals that was cooked for them. Of course, they only could do that once. And the ones who still had the Bah Bon at the last day of camp, could hand it in, in exchange for ice cream.
So that’s how we do it now and it works like a charm! The kids both have their weekly Bah Bon, which is very conveniently posted on the magnetic wall next to the dinner table. Whenever they complain about dinner (or lunch or breakfast), we just point to their Bah Bon and remind them they can hand it in if they wish. No strict words, just giving them a choice and a visual reminder. Our son hasn’t missed his Sunday ice cream once. Our daughter has, once, and she’s not likely to miss another.
Of course, this will only work if ice cream is really a treat for your kids. Mine don’t really get candy or other sweets that often, so for them this works perfectly.
And of course, it’s still kind of a bribe. But I like it much more than the daily ‘If you don’t eat it, you can’t have desert’ bribe. For one, because we don’t have desert every day. Second, because they have to manage the discipline to work all week for their ice cream, rather than getting an instant reward. Third, because I don’t exactly sell the ice cream as a bribe or reward but rather as an interpretation of the 80/20 rule: if they eat healthy and balanced all week, it is all right to have something unhealthy every once in a while.
Most importantly, I like this system because the kids themselves really like this system. They like being in control of what they (don’t) eat without any pressure from us, and most of all they absolutely love our weekly ceremony when they officially hand in the Bah Bon they saved in exchange for their well deserved treat.
Do you have a personal or cultural take on the food you serve your kids? And do you need similar strategies to convince them about it?
This is an original post to World Moms Blog by K10K from The Penguin and The Panther.
The picture in this post is credited to the author.
If you ask her about her daytime job, Katinka will tell you all about the challenge of studying the fate of radioactive substances in the deep subsurface. Her most demanding and rewarding job however is raising four kids together with five other parents, each with their own quirks, wishes and (dis)abilities. As parenting and especially co-parenting involves a lot of letting go, she finds herself singing the theme song to Frozen over and over again, even when the kids are not even there...
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by Dee Harlow (Laos) | May 29, 2014 | Awareness, Breastfeeding, Food, Health, Humanitarian, Laos, Maternal Health, Millennium Development Goals, Nutrition, Uncategorized, World Voice, Younger Children
While I still have the opportunity to write another post for the WMB community before leaving Laos later this year, I feel compelled to tell you about child nutrition and the problem of stunting in Laos because stunting is a seemingly invisible problem that can go unnoticed unless special attention is drawn to highlight the issue.
Ethnically, most Southeast Asian people are shorter and have a smaller frames than most other races throughout the world. This fact makes it easy to say that Lao babies and children tend to be small or smaller because of their race.
Yet at first glance Lao children appear to be healthy (and super cute), a closer look and personal interaction will almost always reveal that the children are a few years older than what you had first assumed. I recently met an adorable girl in a northern village at a school where I delivered books by boat since there is no road access to her village. Upon speaking with her (in Lao) I was impressed by how well behaved, articulate and “mature” she was for what I assumed to be a 6-year old. (I have two 4-year old twins so I was instantly optimistic about their potential in just two short years to be as well behaved as this girl.) She turned out to be 10-years old. This has happened time and time again to me, to my colleagues, and to many newcomers to Laos.
Lao children are among the most undernourished in Southeast Asia with 44% stunting of children under 5-years old. It is the single largest contributor to infant and child mortality in the country with 59% of all child deaths related to nutritional deficiencies. Chronic malnutrition predisposes children to higher morbidity and mortality, lower educational attainment, and reduced workforce productivity.
For a country experiencing rapid economic growth and increasing income disparities, fierce external human resource competition puts the country at risk of leaving a majority of the Lao population behind others who will be more able to keep apace. Stunting is a problem that needs be addressed for the immediate wellbeing of Lao children and to be resolved for the future potential of the Lao people.
The Lao government is working closely with experts and development partners on how to tackle this important issue. It is not easy. Poor breast-feeding and weaning practices are widespread. Almost all mothers give food supplements (such as chewed glutinous rice), and pure water, to infants within a few weeks of birth. Harmful practices (such as discarding colostrum) and other food taboos for pregnant women reduce disease resistance for newborns and increase fetal undernutrition. Micronutrient deficiencies, inadequate intake of vitamin A, anemia and iodine deficiency, all further hinder child development.
The current health system is not only faced with challenges of delivering micronutrients, immunizations and necessary vitamins to the most vulnerable population, but they are additionally burdened by the daunting task of changing people’s behaviors to improve dietary habits, increase nutritional intake, and overcoming cultural belief and religious belief obstacles to improved nutrition status among rural and multi-ethnic communities. The task is daunting.
What is being done and what needs to be done?
There are some great organization here making slow but successful strides on a small-scale basis. UNICEF, WFP, IFAD, Save the Children, the Scale Up Nutrition initiative and others who are collaborating closely with government health officials, but resources are scarce, especially in an often overlooked country like Laos.
- We can channel financial support to these organizations for their work on nutrition in Laos.
- We can lobby our governments to increase foreign assistance resources to address the poor state of healthcare in Laos (e.g., Laos is not one of the United States’ ‘priority countries’ receiving Global Health Initiative (GHI) funding. Ask U.S. representatives, Why not?)
- We can voice our concern to private and public interests who are taking advantage of opportunities in Laos to improve their social welfare practices by investing in better healthcare in communities where they pursue their business interests.
- We can ask the question to anyone willing to listen about who should be accountable to improving the welfare of children beginning their lives under such great odds in Laos.
Hopefully someday, someone will listen and take action.
This is an original post to World Moms Blog by our mother of twins writer, Dee Harlow in Vientiane, Laos. You can always find her writing on her blog, Wanderlustress.
Photo credit attributed to the author.
One of Dee’s earliest memories was flying on a trans-Pacific flight from her birthplace in Bangkok, Thailand, to the United States when she was six years old. Ever since then, it has always felt natural for her to criss-cross the globe. So after growing up in the northeast of the US, her life, her work and her curiosity have taken her to over 32 countries. And it was in the 30th country while serving in the Peace Corps in Uzbekistan that she met her husband. Together they embarked on a career in international humanitarian aid working in refugee camps in Darfur, Sudan, and the tsunami torn coast of Aceh, Indonesia.
Dee is now a full-time mother of three-year old twins and continues to criss-cross the globe every two years with her husband who is in the US Foreign Service. They currently live in Vientiane, Laos, and are loving it! You can read about their adventures at Wanderlustress.
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by Elizabeth Atalay | Apr 1, 2014 | Awareness, Being Thankful, Cooking, Food, Health, Humanitarian, International, Life Lesson, Nutrition, Poverty, Social Good, Uncategorized, World Events, World Moms Blog, World Motherhood
www.livebelowtheline.com
One could barely think straight after five days she was so hungry. Another who is pregnant, was sapped of all energy after only one day. Me, I caused a stink at the grocery store checkout over 65 cents, …..yes, we were impacted. I don’t think any of us will think of extreme poverty in the same way ever again.
Live Below The Line is a campaign created to change the way that people think about extreme poverty. The World Bank defines extreme poverty as living on under $1.25 per day, something that 1.2 billion people in the world currently survive on. These are the poorest of poor, and to truly understand what it means to live that way, you need to experience it. Five World Moms took on the challenge, and in each of our own words here is what we found:
Hannah Ashton – USA
I’m six months pregnant, which is hard enough in itself, particularly when my day is spent running round after my toddler, Maggie, and I hadn’t been sleeping very well, for just one day, I thought I would give the challenge a go. I could, of course, always stop, unlike the many pregnant women around the world, who sadly don’t have that option.
The day started well enough with oatmeal made with water, 2/3rds of a banana and a mug of green tea. I used the tea bag to make 3 more mugs of tea which were like green water by the third and fourth cup. This filled me up until lunchtime which was a kidney bean and carrot burger, using the recipe from “a girl called jack blog”, 1 oz. rice and two flatbreads. Immediately after eating lunch I was still hungry. It was a small amount of food and there was no more food until dinner. I generally eat dinner with my husband when he gets home from work at 8pm. Instead I was too hungry so I ate at 5:30 with Maggie when she ate her dinner. My dinner was a kidney bean, carrot, onion and tomato stew with 2 oz rice. Even though I had soaked the kidney beans overnight, boiled them for 20 minutes and let them simmer in the stew for an hour, they were still very hard, but I ate it all anyway.
Later, as my husband cooked himself a delicious looking steak sandwich, a radish salad and drank a glass of red wine, I cooked up my two remaining flatbreads and made a fresh mug of green tea. “It’s like we’re living in two different worlds tonight,” he commented.
At 3 am I woke up with a splitting headache and was extremely hungry. I came downstairs, took two Tylenol and had a large piece of the blueberry pie that was left over from the weekend. The next day, it is fair to say I really struggled even though the challenge was over. The LBTL diet of the day before had really affected me. I rang my husband at work in tears asking him to please come home from work earlier to help with Maggie’s bedtime routine as I didn’t have the energy to do it by myself (I have a nightly battle with teeth brushing but usually take it in my stride). I had to cancel a play date with a friend and I went to bed at 8:30. It was only by Wednesday, that I felt back to normal.
I’ve not known what it’s like to be really hungry before; I’ve never dieted or not had enough money for food. I can’t say if I was affected by this challenge more than others because I’m pregnant. In a few years, I plan to revisit the challenge and complete the five days. What I can say is the experience has profoundly affected me. No one should have to function on such little calories and the thought of a child having to go through this, especially, is completely heart breaking.
| Item |
Total cost ($) |
Per day ($) |
| 1 lb. dried kidney beans |
1.69 |
0.34 |
| 1 lb. white rice* |
1.07 |
0.21 |
| 24 oz. tomato sauce with basil and garlic |
1.00 |
0.20 |
| 5 instant apple and cinnamon oatmeal* |
0.89 |
0.18 |
| 1 lb. carrots |
0.66 |
0.13 |
| 1 lb. flour* |
0.65 |
0.13 |
| 1 lb. bananas |
0.59 |
0.12 |
| 10 green tea bags* |
0.50 |
0.10 |
| 0.5 lb. onions |
0.33 |
0.07 |
| Total |
7.38 |
1.48 |
*items bought with a friend so we could split the cost.
Deborah Quinn- Abu Dhabi
When I agreed to try living below the line for a day, I mostly had in mind trying to teach my kids about their relative privilege—that their status as “picky eaters” was in fact the ultimate luxury, given that a person only refuses one kind of food if he knows that another sort of food is available. In Abu Dhabi, where I live, $1.50 converts to about 5 dirhams, or about the cost of a large loaf of bread. I had decided that I would make a sort of vegetable, and as I selected one onion from India, one potato still crusted with dirt from Lebanon, two small carrots grown here in the UAE, I wondered whether the people who picked the vegetables were themselves living below the line in those countries.
My “soup” consisted of a chopped carrot, onion, and potato simmered in water with a bullion cube for flavor. I confess that I used my immersion blender to puree the vegetables when they were soft, so that the soup felt a bit thicker and more filling. I used another onion and some dried staples—lentils and rice—to make mejadra, a dish from Ottolenghi’s Jerusalem cookbook. Families all over this region have their own mejadra recipe, each with slightly different proportions of spices, but the dish is quintessential feed-a-lot-of-people-on-not-much: fried onions stirred into lentils and rice. With my soup and my lentils and rice, I wasn’t hungry, but I wasn’t terribly satisfied, either: I wanted sugar, I wanted coffee, I wanted fresh green lettuce and ripe tomatoes.
I thought about the migrant workers in Abu Dhabi, who come from desperately poor towns in places like Goa, Kerala, Islamabad, or Peshawar, who work here for a pittance but are nevertheless making more money than they would at home. What are they filling their bellies with, in order to face another day of work in Abu Dhabi’s broiling sunshine? And given the world’s insistence—and reliance—on global capitalism, with its relentless emphasis on bottom line profits, how will we ever bring about permanent change, so that boullion soup is something you eat only when you have an upset tummy and not because it’s all you can afford?
Alison Fraser- Canada
My first attempt at living below the poverty line was much more challenging than I had anticipated. I had visions of making creative dishes to spread the $1.50 as thin as possible. It didn’t work. The bottom line is that $1.50 doesn’t get you much in terms of food in Canada. My meals consisted of small spooned amounts of peanut butter just to keep me going. I tried to drink lots of water to conquer the hunger, but that didn’t help much either. Fruit and vegetables were much too expensive to include in my meal plan, as winter in Canada results in costly produce.
In the end, my mind kept drifting back to my time in Tanzania where I met women who lived below the poverty line every single day. Some of these women were sick, and were forced to choose between their life and the needs of their children, as many HIV medications can only be taken with food. I can’t even imagine having to make that choice. So unfair.
This was an incredibly emotional experience and next year, I am determined to do it for more than just one day.
Elizabeth Atalay- USA
I could feel the color rising in my cheeks as the cashier called over the store manager. I had $7.50 to spend for my five day Live Below The Line food budget, and the misleading sale sign had just caused my order to ring up 65 cents over my carefully calculated bill. I could see them exchanging exasperated looks as I explained that the (crappy) instant coffee I had purchased was advertised for less than it rang up. The hunger pangs I felt later in the day were not what stuck with me from this challenge, those took place in the privacy of my home. It was the sting of humiliation as the line of people behind me built up while I caused a scene over 65 cents at the grocery store. I was mortified, and imagined having to swallow my pride like this on a regular basis. I can describe the tightening in my chest, the flush of my cheeks, and acid rising in my throat better than I can explain the emotion that moment made me feel…powerless, small, ashamed? The manager explained that the sale was only for purchases of $25 or more. They said they would give it to me anyways since I had told them, without going into detail, that I only had $7.50 to spend, and it was false advertising. As much as I wanted to save face, I certainly wasn’t going to take the time to try to explain that I was doing it as part of the Live Below The Line campaign then, with the impatient crowd waiting for their turn. I plan to take the full 5 day challenge when it officially runs between April 28- May 2nd. After doing it for just one day I can see how impactful it is in deepening empathy, and understanding on the issue of hunger, and what it means to live in poverty.
What $7.50 bought after sales, coupons, and making a scene.
Jennifer Burden- USA
They (LBL) got me. Big time. I’ve read about poverty, tweeted about it, gone to the far reaches of Uganda with the Shot@Life campaign, where I met children who are fed their one and only meal a day at school. I’ve also donated to local food banks, here, in NJ, USA. I felt like I knew how important it is that there are people near and far who go hungry and that 1.2 billion people on the planet live below the poverty line, and that I was doing enough. So, like a “know-it-all teenager” I naively went into this challenge thinking that I wouldn’t really learn much. Boy, was I wrong. Really wrong.
Originally, I signed up for a day of the Live Below the Line Challenge, and then, by Day 2, I had
committed myself to the full challenge — 5 days. I thought I’d be celebrating on Day 5 that I had gotten that far, but there was a whole transformation. Check out my video from Day 5:
Every global health advocate, college student, mom, dad, teen, blogger, journalist, CEO, teacher, living human who is living above the poverty level, etc., should consider experiencing the challenge. The impact on eliminating world poverty would be profound if even more people were involved. It would be incredible. The challenge was a REAL eye-opener and new motivator for me. You’ve gotta do this!!!!!
Visit our World Moms Blog Team Live Below The Line Page to benefit UNICEF, where you can donate to help those less fortunate, or see the impact we’ve already made in the challenge.
The Live Below The Line Challenge will run from April 28th to May 2nd and you can
sign up here as an individual or team.
Will you take the challenge?This is an original post written for World Moms Blog by Elizabeth Atalay, Jennifer Burden, Hannah Ashton, Deborah Quinn, and Alison Fraser.
Elizabeth Atalay is a Digital Media Producer, Managing Editor at World Moms Network, and a Social Media Manager. She was a 2015 United Nations Foundation Social Good Fellow, and traveled to Ethiopia as an International Reporting Project New Media Fellow to report on newborn health in 2014. On her personal blog, Documama.org, she uses digital media as a new medium for her background as a documentarian. After having worked on Feature Films and Television series for FOX, NBC, MGM, Columbia Pictures, Warner Brothers, 20th Century Fox, and Castle Rock Pictures, she studied documentary filmmaking and anthropology earning a Masters degree in Media Studies from The New School in New York. Since becoming a Digital Media Producer she has worked on social media campaigns for non-profits such as Save The Children, WaterAid, ONE.org, UNICEF, United Nations Foundation, Edesia, World Pulse, American Heart Association, and The Gates Foundation. Her writing has also been featured on ONE.org, Johnson & Johnson’s BabyCenter.com, EnoughProject.org, GaviAlliance.org, and Worldmomsnetwork.com. Elizabeth has traveled to 70 countries around the world, most recently to Haiti with Artisan Business Network to visit artisans in partnership with Macy’s Heart of Haiti line, which provides sustainable income to Haitian artisans. Elizabeth lives in New England with her husband and four children.
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by Karyn Wills | Feb 10, 2014 | 2014, Awareness, Being Thankful, Brothers, Childhood, Education, Family, Food, Health, Life Balance, Life Lesson, Milestones, Motherhood, Nature, New Zealand, Nutrition, Older Children, Parenting, Relationships, Traditions, Travel, Vacationing, World Motherhood
One of my enduring memories of childhood is of trapsing over paddocks, up and down hills, in gumboots too big for my feet picking mushrooms or blackberries. Eventually getting sore heels and aching legs. Eventually filling buckets and ice-cream containers with food.
Probably scrapping with my sisters. Probably moaning about having to do so. Definitely covered in blackberry juice and scratches on blackberry days. Definitely not impressed by having to pick mushrooms, which I didn’t like to eat.
This summer holiday, my boys got to harvest their own food. Not blackberries and mushrooms, though. They got to harvest seafood.
Tuatua (too-ah-too-ah) are a shellfish. The children love to collect them. We go out at almost low-tide or just after low-tide in thigh-high water. We do the Twist. Our feet sink into the wet sand and feel around for something hard. When we find one, we reach down and pick it up with our hands.
Sometimes, we are side-swiped by a wave. Sometimes, we pick up a round hard sea-biscuit instead. At times, instead of the Tuatua-Twist there is a Crab-Bite-Leap with occasional bad-language. There is almost always laughter and a competition to see who can find the most. This year, the boys and their cousins also took responsibility for collecting fresh seawater twice a day, to keep the Tuatuas in, while they spat out all the sand inside their shells. They kept them cool in the fridge and, when they were finally cooked, the children ate them: some with gusto, others not so much. To me, they taste a bit like chewy seawater…
Our eldest son, 12 year-old Joe, with his 13 year-old girl cousin, Billie, trapped their own crayfish.
Crayfish are related to rock-lobster and, in our extended family, are usually trapped off-shore and by boat, or dived for with scuba-gear and tanks. Joe and Billie had kayaked out around a small peninsula and discovered an old craypot on the rocks. They dragged it out of the sea and managed to convince their fathers to repair it. They then kayaked it out again and dropped it on a good rocky spot.
Each day they went out to check their pot, just as the adults do the other craypots. The first day they caught – seawater. The second day they caught – seawater. The third day they were a bit fed up and otherwise occupied, so didn’t go out. The fourth day or maybe it was the fifth, Billie was out fishing and Joe went out alone to see what was there and to bring the pot in for good. He was very excited to discover they had caught a legal-sized cray! Yes, duly cooked and eaten.
In these days where many children don’t know that carrots grow in the ground or that their meat comes from a real animal, I love that our boys are sometimes involved in the process of food-collection and the processes of preparing it for a meal. I know that these are the Good Old Days and these moments will create some of their childhood memories.
Do your children do similar things you did as a child? Are they involved in collecting or harvesting their own food?
This is an original post to World Moms Blog from our writer in New Zealand and mum of three boys, Karyn Van Der Zwet.
The image used in this post is credited to the author.
Karyn is a teacher, writer and solo mother to three sons. She lives in the sunny wine region of Hawke’s Bay, New Zealand in the city of Napier.
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by Maman Aya (USA) | Nov 29, 2013 | Communication, Cooking, Education, Family, Health, Kids, Motherhood, Nutrition, Parenting, School, USA, World Motherhood, Younger Children
For the last three years I have had to prepare lunch for my son to take to school with him. I always sent him a warm meal, in a thermos, usually comprised of leftovers or something that I would cook for him before school in the morning. I stood in the kitchen lovingly cooking his lunch every day. The only rules the school had were no nuts or candy. OK – easy enough, considering I always include fresh fruit and a salad and since I am conscience to buy organic whenever I can, I knew that he was having a balanced meal that was healthy and included some of the vital nutrients that his growing body needed.
This September, he started first grade, and the school rules changed. I am no longer allowed to pack his lunch, and he HAS to eat from the cafeteria.
The first graders need to learn responsibility and proper nutrition, so part of that lesson is allowing them to choose their food themselves.
I wouldn’t mind if they had the same organic, fruit and vegetable laden options that I would provide, but they don’t. Apparently they get organic “when they can”, and they try to make the parents feel better by saying that there is a “salad bar” available to the kids with baby carrots, tomatoes, cucumbers, hard boiled eggs and such available. They also have a “sandwich bar” where the kids can have their choice of bread like white sliced bread, bagels, whole wheat sliced bread, etc. (my kids have never had white sandwich bread in their life). They have cold cuts (I don’t ever buy cold cuts at home, since they are full of nitrates and sodium, if anything I would get fresh cooked chicken or turkey and slice it for a sandwich), and butter and jam available. They always have some kind of breakfast cereal (non-organic, mind you), and milk, juice, chocolate milk available to drink. Now to be fair, they have a “hot food bar” available as well, where the kids have a selection of hot foods available usually consisting of some protein, starch, vegetable, a soup, perhaps some pizza or pasta. (more…)
Maman Aya is a full-time working mother of 2 beautiful children, a son who is 6 and a daughter who is two. She is raising her children in the high-pressure city of New York within a bilingual and multi-religious home.
Aya was born in Canada to a French mother who then swiftly whisked her away to NYC, where she grew up and spent most of her life. She was raised following Jewish traditions and married an Irish Catholic American who doesn’t speak any other language (which did not go over too well with her mother), but who is learning French through his children. Aya enjoys her job but feels “mommy guilt” while at work. She is lucky to have the flexibility to work from home on Thursdays and recently decided to change her schedule to have “mommy Fridays”, but still feels torn about her time away from her babies. Maman Aya is not a writer by any stretch of the imagination, but has been drawn in by the mothers who write for World Moms Blog. She looks forward to joining the team and trying her hand at writing!
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by Wall Street Mama (USA) | Nov 8, 2013 | Communication, Food, Health, Kids, Motherhood, Nutrition, Parenting, World Motherhood, Younger Children
Last summer I was enjoying some peanut butter with my two year old son. It was the first time he really ate a decent amount and I was excited because he was such a picky eater and this would be a new food for him to enjoy. I had tested out giving him peanut butter three other times and he seemed to tolerate it fine. Each time he only had about a teaspoon and I closely watched him afterwards to see if there was a reaction.
However, this time, after about 20 minutes, I started to notice his lips swell and he got a blotchy rash on his cheeks and chin.
I immediately gave him Benadryl and then I Googled “peanut butter allergy.” All of the websites I came across listed lip swelling as one of the potentially life-threatening allergic reactions and a symptom of anaphylactic shock. I immediately called the doctor’s hotline since it was the weekend. I spoke to the doctor on call and he said as long as I gave him Benadryl and his breathing was fine that he should be okay. I still wonder if that was the right advice but we were fortunate that the Benadryl immediately alleviated his symptoms.
The next day I called to make an appointment to get him tested at the allergist. I was nervous but optimistic that maybe it was something else and not the peanut butter. After all, I gave it to him several times before and he seemed fine. Perhaps this was a fluke reaction to something else he may have picked up off the floor. I thought about the possibility of being “one of those peanut moms,” and held onto the optimism that my son would not have a peanut allergy. Looking back, I think of my ignorance as well as denial and wonder why I was so closed minded on the topic.
Sure enough, after my brave little guy got pricked in the back multiple times – I heard the dreaded diagnosis: “Your son is allergic to peanuts and tested at the highest end of the range, level 4.” My heart sank and I started to ask all of the usual questions: “What do I now? How does an Epi-pen work? Is he allergic to anything else and most importantly, will he ever grow out of it?”
The first answer was an overview on how to avoid peanuts by eliminating the food, reading labels, asking questions at restaurants and the importance of making sure that everyone who cares for your child knows about their allergy and what measures to take if they ingest peanuts or have a reaction. Then the doctor showed me how to use an Epi-Pen and explained that the box would come with a tester that I could practice with on an orange. As for other allergies, my son did not test positive for any other food groups or animals – just a mild allergy to dust and mold. Lastly, the doctor said that there was a 20% chance he could grow out of it, but not that likely.
I left the office with a feeling of dread and to be honest, at that moment I felt pretty depressed. When I told my husband and my family, their first response was “Oh, he’ll grow out of it.” As if the allergy was not real or that it would disappear as time went on. I know they did not mean it that way, they were trying to alleviate my concern, but it almost felt like someone was telling me his new diagnosis was not real. I started to think of what a severe allergy meant and how it would affect treats, birthday parties, holidays, eating out and the fact that my child would be one of those kids in the lunchroom at the “peanut free table.”
I decided to post a comment on Facebook asking for tips and ideas from anyone else who had a child with a peanut allergy. I couldn’t believe how many of my friend’s children had it and I never knew. They gave me so many awesome tips, links to allergy websites, as well as lists of which cookies and snacks were safe. I immediately felt so much better and knew that if they could deal with it with such confidence, I would be able to as well. Time and time again, the best support in life comes from other mothers!
Since the diagnosis, I have dealt with the usual frustrations that “allergy parents” have. Constantly reminding family members to check labels before feeding your child when in their care, following your child around at birthday parties making sure they don’t eat anything off of a table, bringing your own snacks or treats to events and restaurants, having panic attacks when you go for a quick ride or a day out and realize the Epi-pen is in your other bag at home and lastly – explaining over and over again that peanut allergies are real and my child can die if they have peanuts!
At times, you feel like the crazy person, the exaggerator, the neurotic one. The bottom line is that my child is my number one priority and so is their life. I really don’t care what anyone thinks!
As mothers, we all have something to worry about. I have met many other moms with children who have allergies, and they have it much worse than my son. There are many children who can’t eat wheat, milk and eggs – common ingredients in many of the basic foods out there. I find that much harder to manage than a simple peanut. I actually consider us very lucky that he is only allergic to one thing. Dealing with allergies can be stressful but is also manageable, at least for right now. I am nervous for the future and most days I try not to let it preoccupy our lives. I wonder if my one year old daughter will have it too. I cross my fingers and hang on to the hope that he will fall into the 20% of children that outgrow it. But at the end of the day, my child is happy and healthy and that is most important in life. What more can we ask for?
Do any of your children have allergies? What are the biggest challenges you have encountered with managing an allergy?
This is an original post to World Moms Blog by Wall Street Mama of New Jersey, USA.
Mr. Peanut photo credit to Tomas Fano. No peanuts allergy alert pendant photo credit to BeInspiredDesigns. Both photos have a creative commons attribute license.
Wall Street Mama was born and raised in the suburbs of Chicago and moved to NJ when she was a teenager. She fell in love with New York City and set her mind to one thing after college – working on Wall Street. She has spent the last 16 years working on the trading floor at three major banks. As an Institutional Salesperson, she is responsible for helping large corporations and money funds invest their short term cash in the fixed income part of the market. She lives in the suburbs of central NJ with her husband of 11 years, their amazing 21 month old boy and their first baby – a very spoiled Maltese. She has baby #2 on the way and is expecting a little girl in June 2012. She is a full time working mother and struggles with “having it all” while wondering if that is even possible.
Wall Street Mama was married at the age of 25 but waited to have children because she felt she was too focused on her career which required a lot of traveling and entertaining. When she was finally ready, she thought she could plan the exact month she was ready to have a child, like everything else she planned in her life. She was shocked and frustrated when things did not go according to her plan. Fast forward four years later, after a miscarriage and several rounds of failed fertility injections, her little miracle was conceived naturally. She never thought in a million years, that she and her husband would be in their late 30’s by the time they had their first child.
Since the financial crisis of 2008, she has endured some of the most difficult years of her life. The stress of trying to conceive was combined with some of life’s biggest challenges. She and her husband, who is a trader, both lost their jobs on Wall Street the exact same month. Her mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer and she ended up passing away while she was 6 months pregnant. At times it didn’t seem like things would ever get better, but she has learned that life is cyclical and what comes down must again go up.
Leaving her baby boy with a wonderful nanny each day is difficult, but at times it is easier than she would have expected. She still enjoys the seemingly addictive draw of working on Wall Street. The past few years have been dramatically different from the “good days” but she is focused on trying to achieve what she once had before. She is currently working on launching her own blog, Wall Street Mama, in an attempt to guide others who are focused on continuing their career, yet struggle with leaving their little ones at home. She is weathering the ups and downs of the market and motherhood, one day at a time.
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