At times, life for a family in Manhattan feels like it moves at a faster pace than the rest of the universe. We enroll our kids in music classes at four months, movement and art classes at six months and vie to get accepted into play groups and toddler classes that are deemed to be “feeders” to the best nursery schools in the neighborhood — the so-called “Baby Ivies”.
In Manhattan, preschool madness begins at 7am on the Tuesday after Labor Day every year. Anxious parents flood the phone lines of these bastions of the ABC’s and some schools run out of applications by lunchtime.
To get admitted to a nursery program, you need to apply the September before you’d like to attend, and the admissions process takes nearly a full calendar year. So, if it’s a 2’s program you want, you need to start the application process right after your baby blows out that first birthday candle!
Application fees range from about $30.00 to $200.00 and oh, did I mention that the average price of tuition at these programs is $14,000.00 per year for two or three mornings per week?! Seems a little extreme, I know. In fact, there have even been several documentaries made about this process!
We thought about it and decided to opt out for the two-year old program—since I’m staying home full-time with Chase, there really is no reason to send him to school before he turns three. We take lots of classes, explore the city’s parks and museums and visit family each week. No need to squeeze in 3 mornings per week of school at age two. I am completely comfortable with this decision, and I’m happy with the way our year is going so far without a nursery school program.
So, here we are a year later and in the midst of the madness to gain entry into a “threes” program. I requested applications from four local programs, which is an extremely low number—it is not uncommon for parents to apply to 10 or 11 programs (note: that is about $500 or $600 just to submit all of those applications!). After the essays are prepared and the wallet sized photo of your child is affixed to the upper right-hand corner, the application is submitted. The process involves interviews for both the parents and the children. The parents’ interview is dubbed a “small group tour”. What do they call the kids’ interview? Codeword: “Playgroup”.
Some programs require an individual interview with the parents in addition to the tour. We’ve learned through the process that since we opted out of the two’s program, we are less likely to get our first choice of program and time slot. This is because the current students in the two-year old program get preference for the three’s programs. I’m pretty flexible, though and don’t really think it matters if he goes in the morning or afternoon.
The most sought after programs boast individualized “exmissions” guidance. Now, “exmissions” may not sound like a real word to you, but it’s a real word inside the NYC preschool scene. It is the process, whereby the nursery school director can lobby to get your child a spot in an ongoing private school. Most schools begin private, one-on-one meetings with families starting when the child turns three to discuss placement for kindergarten! Since we are planning to use the neighborhood public school for kindergarten, this isn’t a selling point for us.
We have started our interview process, and so far there have been no tantrums at play groups. Chase has managed to actually have fun at most of the schools, and I never tell him more than that we’re going to a school to play for a little while. He seems fine with that. I tried to select schools that accepted children from a diverse range of backgrounds. I am trying to keep a level head in the process and not get caught up in it all.
Taking the long view, I have to believe that it just doesn’t matter where he goes to nursery school as long as he is having fun. When I was growing up, it seemed that there just was not as much pressure on our parents to schedule our lives and plan our education before we were even potty trained. But, I guess things have changed.
At the end of the day, I’m hoping that he gets accepted someplace that feels right for our family and where there is no pressure on him or us to be perfect. Because, let’s face it, its preschool!
This has been an original World Moms Blog post by Allison Charleston of New York, USA. Allison is a former attorney-gone-stay-at-home-mom.
Photo credit to http://i687.photobucket.com/albums/vv236/dgarci/PRESCHOOL.jpg. This photo has been used within the terms of photobucket.
That sounds chaotic! When I enrolled George in his preschool program, I just took him to see the place down the road from us. He liked it, we liked it, we signed up then and there for him to start the following week. When it was James’ turn to start, he was granted automatic admission by virtue of being George’s brother.
You seem to be keeping a level head about it all, and I’m sure Chase will end up in a place that he loves, that is right for your family. Great post!
Kirsten
Thanks, Kirsten! I think siblings have a leg-up in the admissions process in most of these schools also. That is actually something that makes it a little more difficult to get in .. . sibs take up available spots for new applicants. Everything adds to the insanity! 🙂 Thanks for the comment!
That sounds chaotic! When I enrolled George in his preschool program, I just took him to see the place down the road from us. He liked it, we liked it, we signed up then and there for him to start the following week. When it was James’ turn to start, he was granted automatic admission by virtue of being George’s brother.
You seem to be keeping a level head about it all, and I’m sure Chase will end up in a place that he loves, that is right for your family. Great post!
Kirsten
Thanks, Kirsten! I think siblings have a leg-up in the admissions process in most of these schools also. That is actually something that makes it a little more difficult to get in .. . sibs take up available spots for new applicants. Everything adds to the insanity! 🙂 Thanks for the comment!
This was such a fun article to read! Although this process could totally be giving you a headache, it sounds like you are taking it all in stride which is great! When we were looking for our daughter it was maddening, and we didn’t have nearly as many hoops to jump through. Basically it was more a matter of visiting them that started to wear me out, as we didn’t have to worry about applying other than enrollment already being full.
In the end you are right. Chase is going to be fine no matter what because he has such a loving family : ) Good luck!
Thanks, Jill! We have our last interview next week and I’ll be happy when the process is over!
This was such a fun article to read! Although this process could totally be giving you a headache, it sounds like you are taking it all in stride which is great! When we were looking for our daughter it was maddening, and we didn’t have nearly as many hoops to jump through. Basically it was more a matter of visiting them that started to wear me out, as we didn’t have to worry about applying other than enrollment already being full.
In the end you are right. Chase is going to be fine no matter what because he has such a loving family : ) Good luck!
Thanks, Jill! We have our last interview next week and I’ll be happy when the process is over!
Wow!!!!!!!!!!! Glad you’re staying grounded & not getting caught up in all of it. I’m sure it must be hard sometimes. Curious…is this a big city thing? We don’t have this issue here or in the other places we have lived.
I think this is a NYC thing. I think it all stems from the fact that the private schools (grades K -12) literally recruit from the preschools. The ongoing schools have days when they come to observe their potential applicants from the nursery schools and then the admissions people from the ongoing schools start the dialogue with the “exmissions” people at the preschools. So, if you’re interested in the private school scene for the longer term, you have to get into it at age 2. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as public nursery school for 3 year olds so you have to go the private route if you want a 3s program.
Wow!!!!!!!!!!! Glad you’re staying grounded & not getting caught up in all of it. I’m sure it must be hard sometimes. Curious…is this a big city thing? We don’t have this issue here or in the other places we have lived.
I think this is a NYC thing. I think it all stems from the fact that the private schools (grades K -12) literally recruit from the preschools. The ongoing schools have days when they come to observe their potential applicants from the nursery schools and then the admissions people from the ongoing schools start the dialogue with the “exmissions” people at the preschools. So, if you’re interested in the private school scene for the longer term, you have to get into it at age 2. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as public nursery school for 3 year olds so you have to go the private route if you want a 3s program.
Allison,
I live in a bordering state, here, in the USA, and I had no idea about this process — your window into NYC preschool was very interesting to me! In our suburban area in New Jersey you can arrange preschool visits and some of the most popular schools fill up quickly, so you have to register at least a year in a advance, but I haven’t heard of any interviews. (They may exist, I’m just not aware of any in the area.)
I found our school through word of mouth, and although we are not really religious, it is run by a church. In our area some preschools charge upwards of $500 per month ($5,000+/year), but the one we chose was around $200 per month ($2,000 per year) for a 3-year old program for 3 days a week. Playtime is what were looking for, and the one we chose seemed like a good fit. But, we’re big on foreign language instruction, so we subsidize language classes for our daughter outside of preschool. (I have a post coming next week about that…)
I thought I’d mention our preschool experience to give a comparison within the same country. And, we only live miles away from NYC, so I’m sure it varies even more across the nation! NYC is so unique, and we’re so glad we have you reporting from the big city at World Moms Blog!
Good luck with your preschool decisions. It sounds like you have everything under control and will make the best decision for your little boy! 🙂
Veronica Samuels
Allison,
I live in a bordering state, here, in the USA, and I had no idea about this process — your window into NYC preschool was very interesting to me! In our suburban area in New Jersey you can arrange preschool visits and some of the most popular schools fill up quickly, so you have to register at least a year in a advance, but I haven’t heard of any interviews. (They may exist, I’m just not aware of any in the area.)
I found our school through word of mouth, and although we are not really religious, it is run by a church. In our area some preschools charge upwards of $500 per month ($5,000+/year), but the one we chose was around $200 per month ($2,000 per year) for a 3-year old program for 3 days a week. Playtime is what were looking for, and the one we chose seemed like a good fit. But, we’re big on foreign language instruction, so we subsidize language classes for our daughter outside of preschool. (I have a post coming next week about that…)
I thought I’d mention our preschool experience to give a comparison within the same country. And, we only live miles away from NYC, so I’m sure it varies even more across the nation! NYC is so unique, and we’re so glad we have you reporting from the big city at World Moms Blog!
Good luck with your preschool decisions. It sounds like you have everything under control and will make the best decision for your little boy! 🙂
Veronica Samuels
I heard about this NYC madness! I loved reading your article, and to be honest I am grateful that it doesn’t apply to me! ha! It sounds so stressful!
I love the “Baby Ivies”!!! Too funny! I wonder how many “Baby Ivies” actually get accepted into Ivy League schools??? The tuition is NUTS! The application fees alone are outrageous! $14,000 a year for preschool?!?! That is insane (to me anyway!)
Best of luck to you and Chase!
Thanks, Courtney. It can be stressful!! I’m really not getting caught up in it all. We do lots of things that are fun and I feel that Chase is learning a lot . . he can recognize a Van Gogh at the Met! 🙂 So, I think that whatever school he attends will only supplement the foundation that I’m setting for him. And you’re right, the pricetag is totally insane!!
I heard about this NYC madness! I loved reading your article, and to be honest I am grateful that it doesn’t apply to me! ha! It sounds so stressful!
I love the “Baby Ivies”!!! Too funny! I wonder how many “Baby Ivies” actually get accepted into Ivy League schools??? The tuition is NUTS! The application fees alone are outrageous! $14,000 a year for preschool?!?! That is insane (to me anyway!)
Best of luck to you and Chase!
Thanks, Courtney. It can be stressful!! I’m really not getting caught up in it all. We do lots of things that are fun and I feel that Chase is learning a lot . . he can recognize a Van Gogh at the Met! 🙂 So, I think that whatever school he attends will only supplement the foundation that I’m setting for him. And you’re right, the pricetag is totally insane!!
I can see Manhattan from my town, a town where I have lived since I was born, and I had no idea the preschool process there was so intense. I had heard about a documentary on the issue but have never seen it. Super interesting post!
Thanks, Kally! The movie is called “Nursery University” and I think it was pretty accurate.
I can see Manhattan from my town, a town where I have lived since I was born, and I had no idea the preschool process there was so intense. I had heard about a documentary on the issue but have never seen it. Super interesting post!
Thanks, Kally! The movie is called “Nursery University” and I think it was pretty accurate.
This totally reminds me of the sand box scene from the 1987 film Baby Boom with Diane Keaton, where she’s a high-powered NYC exec who “inherits” a baby following the death of distant relatives. When she overhear’s two mom’s on a bench talking about preschool, one, who is very pregnant, comments that her unborn child is already on the waitlist at some of the top preschools. That’s just so out of balance.
Here in suburban Boston, some schools in the next town over have the sort of enrollment process you mention but not as extreme. Here in my town, enrollments have been down over the past two years so there’s not much cut-throat competition.
I agree that at the preschool level, learning should be play-based and age appropriate. I’m glad you have the good sense to recognize that, after all, it IS only preschool! Thanks for the insight.
I forgot about that scene!! One of the schools that we are looking at notes that it accepts applications “upon birth”. Needless to say, we’re a little behind in that admissions process. 🙂
This totally reminds me of the sand box scene from the 1987 film Baby Boom with Diane Keaton, where she’s a high-powered NYC exec who “inherits” a baby following the death of distant relatives. When she overhear’s two mom’s on a bench talking about preschool, one, who is very pregnant, comments that her unborn child is already on the waitlist at some of the top preschools. That’s just so out of balance.
Here in suburban Boston, some schools in the next town over have the sort of enrollment process you mention but not as extreme. Here in my town, enrollments have been down over the past two years so there’s not much cut-throat competition.
I agree that at the preschool level, learning should be play-based and age appropriate. I’m glad you have the good sense to recognize that, after all, it IS only preschool! Thanks for the insight.
I forgot about that scene!! One of the schools that we are looking at notes that it accepts applications “upon birth”. Needless to say, we’re a little behind in that admissions process. 🙂
Allison – thank you for sharing your story. I thought the process of getting into preschool in San Francisco was crazy (maybe it is and I just didn’t get too wrapped up in it) but this is insane. I am glad to hear that you are keeping a level head about and I am sure you will find a school that is the right fit for your family. As you said, it is preschool after all. Good luck!
a
Thanks! Our last interview is next week. I will be happy when the process is over and our decisions are made. 🙂
Allison – thank you for sharing your story. I thought the process of getting into preschool in San Francisco was crazy (maybe it is and I just didn’t get too wrapped up in it) but this is insane. I am glad to hear that you are keeping a level head about and I am sure you will find a school that is the right fit for your family. As you said, it is preschool after all. Good luck!
a
Thanks! Our last interview is next week. I will be happy when the process is over and our decisions are made. 🙂
I thought about that Baby Boom scene, too!! LOL!! That was the 1st thing that ran through my head.
Different places where we have lived did have waiting lists for their preschools, but what’s going on in NYC seems beyond that. For some families, that whole thing may really work out for them, but it’s just not for us. We took a different route and have made a lot of sacrifices so I could be home with our kids. Peeking into the world of the cut-throat Ivies has been fascinating, though. So glad you shared it with us. 😀
I thought about that Baby Boom scene, too!! LOL!! That was the 1st thing that ran through my head.
Different places where we have lived did have waiting lists for their preschools, but what’s going on in NYC seems beyond that. For some families, that whole thing may really work out for them, but it’s just not for us. We took a different route and have made a lot of sacrifices so I could be home with our kids. Peeking into the world of the cut-throat Ivies has been fascinating, though. So glad you shared it with us. 😀
Wow – I thought it was hard to find childcare in Seattle, but that is just nuts! I am fortunate that there is on-site childcare program that accepts children from 2 months through pre-school and both of my daughters are enrolled there. It is very difficult to get infant childcare slots anywhere here in Seattle, but I believe that for most places, once your first child gets in, your other children get sibling priority on the waiting list.
What I learned through the entire childcare search process and through my experience with my daughters’ childcare center, is that I love a “DAP” (developmentally appropriate program) curriculum. This means that there is no boxed curriculum, the caregivers/teachers develop the curriculum on an ongoing basis to meet the childrens’ interests and development.
Another good sign of a high-quality program is that the center is accredited by NAEYC – the National Association for the Education of Young Children. It is a voluntary accreditation system that sets professional standards for early childhood education programs. You can find NAEYC accredited programs in your neighborhood by searching at http://www.naeyc.org/accreditation.
Best of luck with this whole process Allison!
Wow – I thought it was hard to find childcare in Seattle, but that is just nuts! I am fortunate that there is on-site childcare program that accepts children from 2 months through pre-school and both of my daughters are enrolled there. It is very difficult to get infant childcare slots anywhere here in Seattle, but I believe that for most places, once your first child gets in, your other children get sibling priority on the waiting list.
What I learned through the entire childcare search process and through my experience with my daughters’ childcare center, is that I love a “DAP” (developmentally appropriate program) curriculum. This means that there is no boxed curriculum, the caregivers/teachers develop the curriculum on an ongoing basis to meet the childrens’ interests and development.
Another good sign of a high-quality program is that the center is accredited by NAEYC – the National Association for the Education of Young Children. It is a voluntary accreditation system that sets professional standards for early childhood education programs. You can find NAEYC accredited programs in your neighborhood by searching at http://www.naeyc.org/accreditation.
Best of luck with this whole process Allison!
Such a great post about preschool. Thanks for sharing this to us.