As parents, it’s so easy for us to become so busy, so consumed with daily life and schedules that we simply overlook the fact that motherhood alone doesn’t define who we are.
I love being a mom – and for the first year of my daughter Bella’s life I couldn’t imagine doing anything else. Nor, did I want to. However much I loved teaching, it was nothing compared to being a mother.
But as she has become more independent and I found a routine in our days and weeks, I’ve realized that the longing to do something for me, to fulfill my creative side, never went away. For a while, it was pushed to the back burner with the exhaustion and my brain ceasing to function properly around 10am, but it was still there. A desire to create, to do something with my time and talents.
Not that motherhood doesn’t require all of that – because I know in all of our lives, being a mom comes first. But it’s a temporary job for me, and at some point I will have completed it and be left with just myself again. I want to have something that fulfills me outside of a wife and mother. Something that stirs that little piece of my soul with joy and pride.
For me, this is writing. I find myself immersed in telling a story, sharing a part of my life with others. There are things I love to do simply for the joy of it: knitting, cooking, yoga and photography. But writing is my passion.
It isn’t easy for us to find the time to do things we love. Especially if they don’t pay. For a long time, I struggled with blogging because it was an activity that took much of my “me” time but didn’t produce anything in the end. Being used to having a paycheck for something that I did, I considered throwing in the towel time and time again.
I learned that finding your passion is about you. It’s about what you love, how it makes you feel, the sense of balance it brings to your life. In a society that often encourages money over simple joys, the thought of doing something only because you love it may seem wasteful.
This coming year, I plan on reminding myself that what I do with my life is up to me. How I choose to pursue my passion is my choice. In the end, if it brings me only happiness, a sense of purpose outside of the wonders of being a mother and wife and fulfills a part of my soul that nothing else can – then it’s worth doing.
This is an original post to World Moms Blog from Diana in El Paso, TX. She can also be found on her blog, Hormonal Imbalances.
Photo credit to Red Car Gurl. This photo has a creative commons attribution license.
What Jen has started with groups makes sense because as I went to read your post I had that ‘oh it’s Diana’ moment. How true your words are, I too love to write, in fact I live to write most days. I find it just as hard to justify the time spent doing something I love because it doesn’t pay and it doesn’t result in something tangible to benefit my family.
I need to keep reminding myself that it does keep me sane and happy – you just can’t see that as easy as baked goods or lush green gardens.
Good luck with finding your passion in the coming year, we all need to do this.
I’m glad you had that epiphany with the groups, Fiona! 🙂
Diana, I love what you have written and I totally agree. As a person it is so important for one to find her passion in life. Of course monetary well being is important, and perhaps equally important is also finding joy, that zest for life, that one thing which makes you as a person, and if that is writing for you, I am glad you discovered it 🙂
It’s funny how the Spirit speaks to us. I found myself awake early this morning, before the rest of the household (except our cats) and rather than lying in bed or trying to fall back to sleep, I realized what I wanted to do was write. I’ve been struggling with blogging too. Sometimes it can feel like a dead-end or too open-ended. But what it really is is a forum to practice our skills and unlike journaling, it has the added reward of an audience (sometimes small and personal, sometimes wide-open and vast). Your post really spoke to me on that front so excuse me while I cut my comment short and head over to my personal blog for a while. Write on, sister!
This is powerful post! I’ve been struggling with this between making ends meet as a single mom and doing what I’m passionate about which is writing. Just a couple of days ago I lamented for my best friend that I wish here, writers makes at least enough money but a lot of start up writers doesn’t make that much money.
That’s such a great attitude you have to follow your bliss, to find joy in your passion. 🙂
Diana,
I agree! So many of us know what we really enjoy, but never make the time to do it. I’m glad you are following your dream!!
Jen 🙂
Fabulous post! Obviously I agree with everything you said completely or why else would I be a mommy blogger?! I love to write too. I have found that it fulfills my heart and soul and gives me a piece of myself. I have two kids who I’ve stayed home with since their birth. I haven’t worked out of the house for 8 years yet again I felt like I needed a little piece for me. Traveling is a big part of my life that only involves me right now. And writing and volunteer work are the others. I feel like my life has completely changed once I was able to start blogging as it has opened up a whole new dimension in my life! I can write at home at night or during my few breaks during the day. It is wonderful! Knowing me, even if we could afford it, I would never be happy being a “soccer mom”. I needed some other outlet in my life that was more meaningful and that is writing. Thanks for sharing!!!!
I absolutely LOVE your post! It ressonates completely with me and reminds me of a favorite quote by Joseph Campbell –
“If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living… I say follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be… Wherever you are- if you are following your bliss, you are enjoying that refreshment, that life within you, all the time…”
Also reminded me of a post I wrote ages ago when I still wrote in my blog about raw foodism – http://deeprawemotions.blogspot.com/2008/03/following-my-bliss-in-practice.html and how I have been putting my love for writing after so many other things instead of nurturing it. Your post was a wake up call, thank you!!
Love it!! Share the same thoughts and passion. http://www.wisemommies.com
http://www.facebook.com/wisemommies
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece. I’m still searching for my passion in the mean time I blog which I enjoy, tremendoulsy. I enjoy sharing information about anything and blogging gives me that chance as well as to explore my thoughts and feelings. I used to keep a journal but that’s very personal and you can’t bounce ideas off of any other reader than yourself.
I commend you for finding and fostering your passion. It’s something we all need to do as our kids grow so fast.